Our Little Family

Yes, we are still here.....

2011-12-14T09:25:00.000-07:00

A lot is happening, a lot that right now I can't really put in to words. We are hoping to move at the end of the month and that is going to be fantastic, as long as everything works out. We will finally have space.

Tanis is doing great. She's an absolute fantastic big sister. She has come in to her own bossiness, helpfulness and her speech is coming along great. I love having my one little girl to dote on. She's my cuddle bug.

Michael is a straight A student (at midpoint right now) and he just makes me so proud of him. Now if we could just put some weight on that kid. lol. He's so darn skinny it scares me, but my family reminds me that that's what I looked like at his age. I can say he eats like a horse so it may just be his motabolism. He will not be here for Christmas, again, and that just tears me apart. This will be the third year that he is not with us. Next year he will be, but that's a nother year away. He's not really looking foward to not being here, but it has to be. Things are really tough with him, but unfortunately I can't be too public about it because I never know when someone is going to hold one single word against me now. Sad. We are going to give him our one big family present before he leaves and then he will do Christmas the night he returns. (because the day after he gets back we are supposed to start moving)

Nolan is still.....blah. At the begining of January he is going to be having a endoscopy (throught the mouth and to the intestines) and a colonoscopy done. He will have to be put to sleep for this procedure and that scares me. Its going to take about three hours, and I know I'll be on edge the whole time. Thankgoodness for my cousin because she will be watching my other babies and I know I won't have to worry about them at all. Because of what he is having done, 24hr ahead of procedure he will be put on medicine to clean out his tummy. This in itself is going to suck. The poor kid already has diahhrea and stomach cramps, now we have to give him medicine to make it worse. And no solids, only clear liquids/foods for 24 hrs before. The good thing is that he will be able to have juice/applesauce, etc during this time so he will love that. These are foods he's not normally aloud to have because of the reaction they cause to his tummy. :) Wish us luck.

This is something I love about CO, being able to drive around and see Deer in random yards. They are so pretty, although I'm sure the persons whos plants he's eating doesn't think so.

All my babies

Nolan fell asleep while grocery shopping after having a very bad night. Of coure he couldn't wait for us to get home so mommy could take a nap at same time :)

Brother and sister sharing breakfast in a bag

Sharing breakfast in a bag is a regular occurance :)

Shingles, you don't have to be 60 to get 'em

2011-11-09T15:44:00.000-07:00

Shingles, something I "though" only older people got. Apparently I was so so wrong.

It started about two weeks ago. I had a migraine that lasted almost 4 days. Not out of the ordinary since I get them often because of the thyroid issues. So I ignored it. Then, I broke out with what started as painful bumps all over the back of my scalp. ONo problem, I get psoriases in the winter, so that's what that had to be, right? Then, each one of my lymph nodes around my neck and shoulders swelled up very bad. They were beyond painful. The one under my chin, yeah, couldn't even bend my head down. Then the one that's on the lower part of my neck next to shoulder, couldn't move that arm at all or turn my head the slightest bit to the right without the pain surging through my shoulder and down my back. Then a huge red welt looking line formed from one of the scabs/lups on the bottom right, down my neck and then back up towards my ear. (I found out later it was going towards a lymph node and this is called Lymphangitist,where line forms from the infection site towards the closest lymph node, and its VERY VERY painful line) So I decided, along with the hubs pushing, that it was time to go the ER.

I get there and its beyond packed. And of course, I left my wallet at home. That totally sucked because I fed the babies and took off with the full intention of getting someting out of the vending machine. But, my awesome cousin came to the rescue and brough me some much needed nourishment. :) Thanks B.

So, after a couple of painful hours (and I mean pain almost as bad as giving birth people) I was taken back. The Dr came in pretty quickly and told me what it was. I asked him if he was sure, and he said yes. I told him that all the ads say that older people need to watch out for them, the vaccines are ONLY for people 60 and older. How did I get it?

He said its part of the chicken pox virus that sort of stays behind (kind of like once you get a cold sore, you carry the virus and they always come back). And a major factor in younger people that causes it is stress. Yay.

So now I am on two different kinds of mediation and pain meds. It's going to take about 2wks for the bumps to go away, but there is no known time frame for the pain to go away. This is not good. We are looking for a house, I'm trying to find a job so the stress level isn't going to go away any time soon.

Stress people, is not good. First the husband gets a massive ulcer and now this. All I have to say is there better be a good ending to the end of this year!

Good Morning....Blizard anyone?

2011-11-02T08:58:00.002-06:00

We have a Blizard/winter storm warning and around here we've learned to take the warnings with a grain of salt. However, today, they were right. We woke up to snow already on the ground and the temp at 6am this morning was a mere 23 degrees. Now, at almost 8am its a warm 27 degrees. (and our wind chill is blah, with winds up to 50mph) Our high today is going to be a hot 34 degrees. So, I sent the hubs and son to school all bundled up and bid them farewell.

Right now the roads are pretty scary and of course Michael goes to one of the only schools in the Springs that isn't closed or on a delay. Poor kid. Hubs called me when he got to work and said that his speed maxed out at a whopping 25mph. On one major road he had the person in front of him spin out. Yay. Our police department is on whats called a "weather allert" which means if someones not hurt, dying, or in really bad need don't call them. Not only is it not safe for you to be on the road it's not safe for them either.

This also means that the kidos and I are pretty much on lock down in the living room. The heaters in this dreaded apartment are floor heaters, like the ones in hotels. The one in the babies room, SUCKS! Not only that, they cost a damn fortune to run. So, we have the heaters going in the living room and will only use the ones in their room at nap time. (before and after because they get really damn hot to the touch) Being in the living room suchs because it's super crouded with boxes and crap. It's going to be fun cuddly day. lol.

This is obviously our paitio furniture. What you can't tell is that it's not only snow, it's FOZEN solid.I went to pick up one of the pillows and they were stuck to the couch. lol.

For some reason I can't get this picure to load the correct way, but you can see the gloom in the sky. And the snow on the ground is actully frozen.

Brought the kids toys in the living room. Bring on the mess :)

This is the heate. It gets pretty hot and so I have to make sure it's not on when I put the baby to bed. Otherwise he's bound to get hurt since he's my little trouble maker and gets in to everything.

Being a surrogate

2011-10-28T07:29:00.000-06:00

I have this "aunt" who it totally awesome! She isn't technically my aunt but she was my moms best friend from school until my mom passed away. I really got to know her when I was visiting CA one summer way back when, and of course, like my mother, I fell in love with her. We don't talk all the time, don't see each other often, but when we do, it's like we never stopped talking and nothing has changed. I am sure it's just as hard for her as it is for me, because when I see her, I think of my mom.

My aunts kids are just like her, awesome!

She has a daughter who has a great big heart, and awesome daughter, and is an all around great person. She is now taking the opportunity to help another couple have a family. She is going to become a surrogate. She has already started her journey and I wish her nothing but love, support and a shoulder when she needs it.

Please join me in following her through her journey. She is very new to the blogging world, and the surrogate world so if you know anything, can help, can pass on words of wisdome, etc, I bet she would love to hear from you.

My Surrogate Journey

Congrats my friend, best of luck and a big giant hug to you and your baby girl A!

It's Snowing

2011-10-26T08:37:00.000-06:00

The snow came in last night. We are supposed to have between 3-10" of snow here in the Springs with the high today of 31degs, and the low tonight of 18degrees. The kids are loving watching the snow fall down and we have an awesome fire in the fireplace. And of course this is only going to last a day or two. By Fri our high is back up to almost 65.

I am going to try to keep track of snow we get by taking pictures of the ledge of my patio. I will update laster.

These pictures were taken earlier this morning. Will take pictures later after more snow hits. It hasn't stopped the slow snow all morning.

A Missed post....Tans Birthday

2011-10-26T08:23:00.000-06:00

I just found my camera with all of Tan's Birthday pictureson it. That's what happens when you are packing, you find a lot of missing items. I can't wait to be out of this damn apartment!

We just did something small at home and she got a cake that was supposed to look like a lego, but let me say, they did a crap job,especially for a specialty designer.

I can't believe that my little girl is 4 years old already. Time goes by so fast. She is an amazing person to watch grow and learn. She makes my heart swell with pride and love! I look at her and I am so grateful that God blessed us with her. I just wish that her grandmothers were here to watch her grow up, like they were here for us.

Happy Birthday Baby Girl!

Tanis and her cake, she loved it and that's what matters!

Our girl loves to color and draw

This was her baseball set that she got. We opened it, and she started to play it in the house, and the first ball went through the living and to the wall opposit in the dining room. We then decided its a toy to play outside.She loved it!

You load the balls in to the red container, she steps on the little red button on the bottom, and the arm lifts up so that the black thing will attach to the velcro on a ball and set it up for her. She loves it! She will be our little sporty princess.

First snow last weekend

2011-10-13T15:35:00.000-06:00

We had our first snow here last weekend. It was so nice, relaxing to watch out the back door.And Michael got to see is first snow. He was in awe. A little surprised when we told him it was nothing compard to what it can/will most likely be like when winter is really here.

This weekend we are back in to the 70's with our lows at freezing. My hormonal butt is loving the cold nights.

Tanis wanted to go out and do snow angels already. We had a complicated time explaining to her that it was only a little bit and not even near enough for snow angels yet. lol.

These were taken the day after our minor snow storm, but these mountains are abot 10 minutes from our apartment. Don't you just love the view!

Pikes Peak being hidden by the clouds

Dr. Update

2011-10-11T12:26:00.000-06:00

First, I have to say, the GI specialist we went to this week, ROCKED! She might not know exactly what the problem is, but she's more than willing to try what she can to figur this out. Here are the points of what she says:

* she thinks that all this most likely started with a virus/stomach bug, etc and that his digestive track just hasn't gone back to normal. So, we arestarting him on twice a day, 7 day antibiotic, then a pill once a day of a stomach bacteria (good one) added to his drink, for 12 days. Then we will wait and see how he does for two weeks and go in for a check up. all of this she is hoping will get his stomach back to normal with normal functions and normal bacteria.

* so the plan is to take him off milk and fruits for the next five weeks. This is because even if he's not lactose itollerant, lactose can make diahrrea worse and so can the natural sugars in frui. (we tested and it made it way worse! This sucks however, because he loves his fruit and cheese- so this weekend I went and got the vegie cheese and he loves it. He also took really well to the pedia sure and soy milk.

* we will be putting him on a pedia sure that is prescription only three times a day. It's non-dairy and thankfully covered by insurance

* test for a whole slew of food allergies just in case, stool sample testing, and an array of blood tests
(we did this yesterday and since he has had a couple of nurses in the past not do so good, he freaked right away. it took myself and two other nurses to hold the poor guy down just to draw blood)

* she sais last but not least there is something that is called toddler diahrria, and it can last from 1yr to 4yr. Ok, hate to say it, but no way in HE!! am I going to let this go on for the next 2yrs. No way jose!

*We go back in five weeks and I am hoping this all works out so he can stop with the poop and the pain.

As of yesterday, after being on the meds for three days, he seems to be doing better. We shall see what happens after he's done with the whole process and we wait it out a little The last few things we've tried worked for a very short time, then it came back even worse.

So, there you have it. The best news I've had yet, she's trying, and it seems to be doing good so far. There is a glimmer of hope out there.

Can you say twins?

2011-10-11T09:23:00.000-06:00

I'm at my whits end.....

2011-10-04T13:57:00.000-06:00

My poor son, my poor family, UGH! That's about all that I can say right now. Little dude has been having major stomach issues for about the last three months. We are talking about diarhhea that is so bad we've had to take apart his car seat, (which was not easy at all) clean the seat and under it in our truck, we've had to throw away a ton of clothes, sheets, etc. Not to mention all the pain the poor boy has been in during this whole time.

It started out with his Dr thinking it was just a virus so we were told to change his diet, and still nothing. We were then sent to Denver (over an hr drive from here) to Childrens Hospital GI Clinic. They checked him for everything. Crohns desease, celiac desease, and other issues. They have yet to find anything. So they said that it might be from a virus that he had but his digestive system just wasn't going back to normal. So they said to add probiotics to his food once a day and to make sure he got at least one to two servings of yogurt a day. We've been doing that for over a month, and not much of a change. To say it's wearing us down is an understatement. We are talking about a baby that is in pain off and on all the time, he wakes up in the middle of the night in wrenching pain, endless soaking and laundry, tons of diapers and wipes, and did I mention with all the laundry that keeps having to be done our water heater keeps going out. Our apartment maintenace manager has been here but they just have to keep restarting it because they can't figure it out.

This past Sunday, I was out during the morning and I got a phone call from the husband. He said I needed to come home ASAP because it was bad. Well, I've seen bad but figured it had to be dealable. I was so wrong. It was so bad, that the little dude required two baths, the blankets, stuffed animals, night clothes, sheets, etc that were in the crib were not salvagable AT ALL, not to mention the crib. It was so bad, we ended up having to tear it down and go get him a temporary toddler bed. (when we move-more info on that in Nov, he's going to get an actual twin bed). It was in every nook and crany. Thats how bad it is.

Last night he was sleeping all great in his new toddler bed (which has been an effort to get him to do since it was such a drastic quick change) and at midnight he woke up screaming, balled up on the floor. When you pick him up or hold him he just wants to curl up and you can see he's in so much pain.

I hate feeling helpless as a mom, not being able to fix it, or at least make the pain go away. It's drianing on him, us, our family, etc. The other kids are losing attention because it's mostly spent on the baby boy, us parents are losing a lot of sleep, and slowly losing our minds. He has an appointment Fri and I am praying each night that they can figure out what is going on with him. Everything they suggested isn't working. I have no idea what to do now. I've done research and everything it could be they've already tested him for. We shall see, but this time, I'm not taking the "Lets waits and see" game. No way in hell on this one now.

His first night in his bed, after about 2 hrs of getting him used to it

Today, his first nap where he stayed in his bed.

Miss Tan was so proud she made her bed. I've asked her if she wants me to make her a new blanket (the one with the care bears is about 2 yrs old. its brown on the other side) and she won't give it up. Not to mention the array of stuffed animals on her bed. She's come sucha long way to being such a big little girl. Oh how I love waking up to her smile every morning.

September

2011-10-04T13:30:00.000-06:00

Septermber in this house was pretty uneventful.

I had my 32nd Birthday. Holy cow I can't believe I'm that old already lol. It's all good because I still get carded, so that's a plus right? :) At least for my ego.

At the end of the month we celebrated our 5th Anniversary. I can't beleive we've been married for 5 years already. With all that we've been though it feels a lot longer.We've been through more than most people married 50yrs. I wouldn't change any of it for a million dollars. We have been through many ups, down, many many losses, but we make it through each day together. We try to take advantage of each day, because we know, with all our family losses and health scares, what each day can mean. Here's to 50 more years babe! I love you and our beautiful family!

Michael is doing great. School is awesome and he loves it. (doesn't get that from me). He had his progress reports a couple of weeks ago and he's got straight A's and B's. Oh how happy it would make me for him to make Honor Roll his first semester back. The only thing that mind bungle that up in band. We have no idea how he was placed in it, but he will be leaving the class in two weeks so we are hoping he can keep his grades up for the rest of the time and then he will be set. He makes us so proud of him.

Mommy and baby boy! Isn't he so handsome! Just like daddy!

Mr. Cutie

Tanis, baby boy, myself, my little cousin and my cousin's dog Zoie. She's so adorable!

And yes, she thinks she's a baby most of the time. lol .

Can you tell, he HATES hats.

She loves them!

If Tan sits on the floor, little dude has to sit with her. She asked him to get up......

So he stood up......

Then she changed her mind and they sat and watched TV like this for a little while

August

2011-09-06T09:54:00.000-06:00

Wow, what a month. Michael just got home at the end of July. The fourth was Tan's 4th Birthday. I can't beleive my little girl is already 4 years old. She's so big, so tall, so smart, and makes me so proud of her all time. She's such an awesome little girl. I couldn't ask for anything more.

Michael started school this month. He loves his new school, although he does have to wear a uniform. He placed in Advanced Math and Advanced Laguage Arts. (English) and that makes me even more proud of him. He didn't do great in school in CA and now I have all the faith in him that he will be back on his way to honor roll once again.

And little dude got his first buzz cut.

Little Dude before his hair cut

After. Now he really looks 2 or 3. lol.

Sleeping on mommys lap (which only happens when he's sick )

Deer at the apartment down the street. I love this area becaue we are so close to he mountains that we get all the awesome weather and beautiul animals.

A rainbow we saw as we were pulling out of the drive wa to take Michael to first day of school

My prud 6th Grader on first day of school

My baby girl

I love seeing this view all the time. It takes my breath away

Baby girl cuddling with mommy

July

2011-09-06T09:23:00.000-06:00

Well, July was pretty eventful and ended on fantastic note. I am so excited to say that this month ended with us getting my son back, for good. Michael is (as of end of month) now back home with us for good. I am so happy that he is home, and that he is where he really wants to be. The trip to CA was nice. I got to spend some time with my cousin, I got to see my dad and just be back for a little while. Not to mention I got to come home with the best luggage ever, my son.

Daddy and little dude

All my babies togther

Nolan in urgent care (his home away from home)

Myself on day of court

My dad, Michael and me!

Me and my dad

My dad and Michael

Tan playing with her little brother

May Update

2011-06-08T07:30:00.000-06:00

Well hi there. I know it's been a very long time since I've been here. Life has been a busy whirl wind. I am hoping next week when I go to get my other dude that the whirl wind is over and life will be grand.

In the mean time, not much has changed around here. Tan is getting big and so is little dude. He just turned one, can you believe it, he's frigging one. I now have a 10 1/2 yr old, a 3 1/2 yr old and a 1 yr old. That just makes me feel old.

Here are some pictures from little dudes birthday:

We were shopping for birthday hats and I loved this one but he wouldn't keep it on lol

Little Dude and daddy hanging out on his birthday

Tan helping little brother open presents

Tan eating her cupcake

Little dude starting his cupcake

He's getting there

I think he likes it

The end results lol

April Michael's Visit and Trip to zoo

2011-06-08T07:29:00.000-06:00

I had had another minor surgery in March and the day I was in having it little Dude decided he was going to projectile vomit everywhere. His car seat, all over daddy, in his walker, etc. It was so bad the clothes he and his father were wearing we had to throw away. I got home and took him to the ER to make sure all was ok because he wouldn't drink, didn't want to feed him and he was running a pretty high fever. He was not a happy camper. They got us in a room pretty quick. He was dehydrated but the Dr gave me a chance to try to get him to drink before they started an IV. (IV on him, no thank you) After about an hour I ws able to get him to drink so we got to go home after he drank 3 hospital sized pedialytes. He was sick for the next 3 days.

Michael came to visit for almost 10 days this month for his spring break. It was a blast having him here. Tan and little dude just followed him everywhere he went. I can't wait until he's here for good. I miss having all three of my babies with me. Adam didn't get to go with us to the zoo because he picked up the stomach flu that little dude had. It kept both of them in bed for almost 4 days each.

My babies watching the meerkat babies

Tan just loved the little meerkats

When you first walk in there are Giraffs and you can feed them. Michael thought they were cool but the little ones were scared the minute they stuck out there 2ft tongues. lol

They just started at the male giraff (there were 2 that were segregated)

My two older babies

(remember: hes almost 11 and shes only 3 lol)

These gorillas were in the mood for photo ops!

The big bear was swimming, jumping in and out of the water.Completely worth the hike to get up there.

This big guy was so darn cute. If you kissed the glass he kissed it back. Sometimes he would even wave at you. I just wanted to reach through the glass and hug that guy.

March update

2011-06-08T07:13:00.000-06:00

Not much really happened in March. Just taking things day by day and enjoying the time at home with my babies while I can.

Little Dude chillin in daddy's A's hat (and it's the only one he keeps on)

Tan wearing daddys sunglasses

(my kids love wearing daddys things lol)

Two of my beautiful babies

Tan sleeping in her new bottum bunk

February

2011-06-08T07:10:00.000-06:00

There has been a lot going on behind the scenes here lately and that's why there hasn't been much time to update, share pictures etc. Here are some pictures from February.....

Michael came to visit and we did his Christmas. I so miss my baby and hoping next week when I go to get him all is fantastic.

Little dude at the begining of February, he was talking to his kangaroo toy

Tanis waiting for her dinner

Michael opening presents

Michael and his giant legos. Just like Adam Michael is adicted to legos.

His new Tony Hawk skate game, with a real skate board.

Out at dinner while he was here

Mommy and little dude at his Drs apt

Mommy, Little Dude and Miss Tan

An Exciting Visit

2011-02-25T07:38:00.000-07:00

Oh this past week/end was totally fantastic. We got a visit from my oldest angel. We didn't do much, but we had a blast just all being together. It was so nice to be able to wake up in the morning and have all my babies there, to be able to hug and kiss them all when ever I wanted, to be able to tuck each one in to bed at night and just to be a whole family again. We miss him so much when he is gone and I am praying that it won't be long before he's back with us for good.
When we took him back to the airport, his little sister just stood there and said "i want my buddy back". (buddy is his nick-name) It made me even more sad. It won't be long again and he's back for another visit and then shortly after that, if it all goes our way, then he'll be here with us.

My angels all together the first morning he was here

After his haircut...so handsome!

His first real deer sighting

Brothers at dinner

Say cheese :)

Miss Tan at dinner

My two oldest hanging out after just getting up

Miss Tan saying goodbyes, over and over, to her big brother

All my angels at the airport

That's how we made sure she didn't wonder, and she did fantastic...at Denver Airport...my big girl!

After brother got on the plane

After brothers plane took off and she realized he wasn't getting back off

Wow, it's FREEZING!!!!!

2011-02-01T16:00:00.001-07:00

I can not believe how stinking cold it is outside. Right now it's about -29 (what it feels like with windchill factor) and this is what the inside of my bedroom windows have looked like all day long. Im sure, since we are supposed to get to -15 tonight that it won't be going away anytime soon. Not to mention that I have all the floor heaters working and it's still cold in here. Oh boy I can't wait for this storm to pass.

That is ice people, not paint on the side of my windowsill.

These are all over the place..so huge and pretty

2011-02-01T12:25:00.000-07:00

I can get in my truck, drive anywhere and these are all over the place. In peoples yards, in parking lots, in parks, and walking down the street.

Yes, this picture is very real, and he was huge, and at one point, turned and stood facing the truck. We had our first deer stare down. lol.

There ended up being an entire family in this yard but they all walked away before I could finish taking pictures. There were 10 deer in total. So beautiful.

He's one crazy little daredevil!

2011-02-01T12:21:00.000-07:00

He started "slapping" the vaccuum, so like any other good mom I had to stop, get the camera, and video it.

Wow, what timing?

2011-01-20T09:47:00.002-07:00

In Tears

2011-01-18T15:31:00.000-07:00

I have this program that someone gave to me a very long time ago and I am finaly using it. It's a prgoram that you can do scrapbooks on and since I don't have the time to do a "real" scrapbook I figured this would be a great way to do it and then go somewhere and have them printed. I was working on Tanis' book and pulled out the cd's with all her baby pictures on it.

On that disk are several videos, of which a few of them are of my grandmother. I have not been able to view these videos because my MAC wasn't able to do it, but, I gave it a shot today, and since this computer has Windows on it, bam, they played.

You would think that after 2 years of her being gone, almost 3 in March that this would have been easy. But, I haven't heard her voice in almost 3 years, and a day before she passed away. It hit me like a rock. I viewed just two videos and I can't stop the tears.

They are of love, of joy that my baby girl, if only for a moment, got to meet the other mother of my life, my one parents I could always count and the one person that loved me unconditional.
They are tears of sadness because now, only Michael is the one who really got to know her, who loved her, and misses her with me.

Tanis and buddy will never get to know either one of their three grandmothers and that saddens me to my soul. And not only that, besides the few pictures I have taken, I have come to the realization that I don't have that many pictures of my grandmother, and because I had a step-mother who thought that she could scrap book and went through all my pictures and destroyed them all, I also have very few of my own mother.

Im not sure if these will load, but I'm going to give it a shot anyways.

Yay, I'm excited

2011-01-18T06:28:00.000-07:00

I am beyond excited right now. I got news that my oldest will be here in less than a month. I so can't wait. I msised seeing him for Christmas because of my surgery and the complications and I wasn't going to see him until his spring break at the end of April, but now, he will be here in less than a month. Oh how I feel a part of me will be returning, even if it's for a short period of time. I can't wait to hug him, squeeze him, cuddle with him, and kiss him all over.

Oh my goodness, I know I say it a lot but I can't believe how big my two youngest babies are. My oldest is going to freak when he sees that his 3yr old sister is probobly 3/4 of his 10yr old size and his little brother is half her size. lol. Oh how I love my babies.

Tan and baby boy (who's leaning on daddy an not even fully standing up) Can you believe she's 3 and he's only 7 months old!!!!

Buddy on his new toy from Miss D. It's awesome. Its a rider, then a push toy, then a scooter

Look mom I can do it by myself!

Miss Tan riding it the scooter way

My 100th Post and It's all Pictures

2011-01-11T13:40:00.000-07:00

I don't really have much to update on except the fact that I love the way my babies get along. Tan is making such a fantastic big sister. I love it.

Tan giving brother some love

Mommy and son, please excuse the blah-ness of the picture as I took it myself :)

Tan in her brothers bumbo, he doesn't fit but she does so it's now going to be her booster seat. She's so darn skinny

Brother watching sister in his bumbo. He thought that it was super funny.

Wow my kids are HUGE!

2011-01-05T14:04:00.000-07:00

I had to take buddy in to the Dr's yesterday. He weighed in at 19.9lbs. Hello, he's only 7months old and he weighs as much as a 1yr old. So, even though it was a Dr's apt I asked them to measure him and ......guess what....he's almost 30" tall. That's taller than a 1yr old. It's not going to be long and we are going to have to get him a convertible carseat. I am so happy we spent a little extra money on the infant carseat that will accomidate him until he's a little bit bigger.
I love that he is growing and striving but it makes me so sad sometimes. He is my final little baby. I watch him growing and it kills me inside because its like his baby-hood it being taken away from me way too soon. It's not fair. Why does my final baby have to be the one to grow up way too fast. He's not as indipendent as Tan was at that age, so I am happy for that. He still loves me to hold him, he will lay asleep in my lap. When he does, I just sit there and stare at him, so peaceful and my heart fills with love and happiness.

You can't really tell in this picture, but he's wearing 12 month clothes and they just fit. He got an 18 month pj for Christmas, the darn thing fits him. lol.

Miss Tan, she's only 3 and she's the size of the average 5yr old

They are beautiful if I do say so myself!

Finally!!!

2011-01-04T07:51:00.000-07:00

Finally, after months of agony and teething our little dude brought in his first tooth yesterday! To say I was a proud, excited, happy mommy was an understatement. Now, if the happiness can follow through to his Dr's appointment today that would be great. He's been sick since a week before Christmas, coughed so hard yesterday on the way to get daddy from work that I had to pull over and check on him. He was blue so I had to take him out of the carseat until he could catch his breath. Ugh! Talk about scary.

Snow, how exciting

2010-12-30T15:34:00.000-07:00

Well, we have our first real snow of the year. We shall see if they weather people were right. They say 2-4", but it started snowing an hour ago and it's probobly dropped 2" already. Can't wait to see how much falls. Right now I have the shades open because Miss Tanis has to see the snow. She loves it. We now have a sleigh courtesty of Miss D so mybe it will get some use this weekend, at least by daddy and Miss Tan. Buddy isn't feeling up to it right now as he's sick.

The snow is so pretty but since it's so cold outside that means our trip to Sams is not going to happen tonght, which is ok because I don't want to take buddy out in the cold. Our low tonight is supposd to be about -3 degrees. Should be nice. :) Thank goodness we have the fireplace.

This is what it looked like when the snow started

This is my patio one hour later

View from my patio one hour after it started

View from my front door one hour after is started

Update on Me (Boring I know lol)

2010-12-29T12:53:00.000-07:00

My dad asked me on Christmas day how I was doing medically. It bothers me so much that people associate me with medical issues. I even talked to my husbands boss from CA that we haven't talked to in over a year and he asked almost the same thing. Oh how this saddens me to the bone. I have that instead of people asking how life is, how is the family, how were you holidays, they ask, how are you doing with your health. Yes, I seem to be a medical mystery and it gets even worse as the days go on. It seems that once one thing is figured out, another situation rears it's ugly head. I know God it putting me and my family through this for his reasons, and if we couldn't make it through it than he wouldn't allow it, but oh how it hurts my heart to have to keep putting my family, my husband, my babies through all this.

The recent black outs before Thanksgivng have confused my drs. I had an MRI two weeks ago that seems to be clear of anything pertinent to the situation at hand. I had a cardiologist (yes, I am only 31yr old and I am seeing a heart Dr) and he thinks that it's my heart and blood pressure due to the complications from the thyroid surgery several years ago that still seems to haunt me. So, in a week I will have what is called a tilt-test and a Echocardiogram. The tilt-test does not seem to sound very fun. They are going to strap me down to a table, make me super relaxed, insert an IV, and then tilt the table up really fast back and forth. The Dr said the goal is to make me black out again and he has real thought that this is going to happen. At this point he said that if it does happen that he will watch all my symptoms and we will go from there with treatment. Then later that day I have an echocardiogram of my heart. yay.

Yesterday I saw my new endocrynologist. To say that I don't really care for him is a major understatement, however, he is the only Dr in the entire town that I can see. Other wise, I have to go to Denver and that's not going to happen right now. He is going to run a slew of blood tests, send me to a neurologist, have a ultrasound of my neck done, get my records to find out what kind of cancer I had because he said that if it was really on my para-thryoid that it was a rare cancer and he wants to check that. Oh the joys.

However, good news is, that my hysterectomy got rid of my severe pain. I still have a tiny bit of tenderness from the surgery but all seems to be doing 99% better. I can not lay down, play with my babies, bend over, carry my son, etc. I am so happy about that, to be able to be me, do what I do on a nomral day. Thank you so much Dr. M.

Other than that, same old same old. lol.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-29T10:54:00.000-07:00

From our hearts and home to yours we hope your holidays are filled with love, joy and family!

Good Morning and Merry Christmas daddy! Love Tan

Good Moring daddy love buddy!

Our Stockings

Mornig brother and sister, Merry Christmas!

Tan and her new table

Brother trying to help open Miss T's present lol

Daddy helping buddy open a present, not that he needed much!

Miss Tan and her new punky brewster DC shoes, she loved them as much as her new boots!

Buddy opening a present he loved from Miss D and Mr T!

Miss Tan's present from Miss D and Mr T, an awesome baby doll set with crib, changing table, baby doll, swing and crib

Buddy and mommy opening a present together

Miss Tan and Thomas the train

Buddy helpin mommy open a present

Tan tearng open and screaming about her legos, one of 4 sets she got for Christmas

Tan and her new jacket, that she loved and has worn every day since

Tan and her hair set that Miss D and Mr T got her

The "after" picture

Buddy chasing his tractor under the tree

Daddy and Tan Christmas night after they put together one of her lego sets

Picture Bonanza

2010-12-15T08:55:00.000-07:00

Two of my precious angels, she was on the floor making faces at brother

His first real ride in a stroller, and yes it was his sisters, please excuse the polka dots lol

He wanted both of them

Didnt want to give them up

He's already ready for christmas lol...can't keep him from crawling towards the presents grandpa has gotten them lol.

Not much

2010-12-13T14:15:00.000-07:00

Not much has been going on here lately. Sadly I dont have any pictures to post as I have not uploaded the camera in a little while. Life has been pretty crazy lately. We have a relative that has been staying with us for the last month and will be here through this month. It's been nice having the company but it's been really hard to keep up. I stil don't have much energy, still have a little pain now and then, but getting there. I have a check up later this week Ican't wait to see what the Dr says. I had an MRI today, can you say SCARRY! yes, I am very scared of enclosed areas. I will be having a cardiology appointment soon. We shall see what the results say. i can't wait to see them that's for sure.

The kids are doing great. Tan is growing like a weed and very excited for Christmas. Little boy had his 6 month check up last week. He wasn't a happy camper as he had 4 shots and an oral vaccine. He is in the 99% for height, yay hes taking after my side of the famiy, and he's 70% in weight, again my family. None of my children may look like me but they sure do take after me in other ways. :)

Other than that, just getting ready for the holiday and missing everyne we don't get to see.

Update

2010-11-29T10:46:00.000-07:00

Well, there's been a lot going on around here. I've been back to the ER the day before Thanksgiving because I blacked out twice in one day. I have never done this before. There are two parts of the day, about 2 minutes worth that I don't even know what happened. My husband said it's like I wasn't there and then my legs just went out from underneath me. It was scary. I am so happy I have help here with me.

We celebrated Thanksgiving and Tan and I went and saw my uncle and his family. We weren't able to stay long since I wasn't supposed to be driving much anyways. :) I just haven't seen them in too long and I really wanted to see them.

Last night we had our first snow and today, it's stuck. :) Tan is in love with the snow. Daddy took her outside last night to play for it in for a little bit and then took baby boy out there for a quick second. Tan keeps looking outside today and saying "it's snowing out there!!!" lol. She loves it now. Last year when it snowed it scared her the first time.

Daddy and Tan in snow

Daddy and Tan playing in parking lot

tan after a snowball fight with daddy

Daddy and baby boy

Our patio the morning after

Other than that, all is well. I am recovering, Tan is growing like a little weed. Baby boy was finally diagnosed with reflux and he is now on meds and they seem to be helping a whole lot, thank goodness. Here are some other updated pictures.

Tan makign a square with her tools

A fox in our backyard, he seems to be a fixture in our backyard now :)

comments are fixed

2010-11-18T08:24:00.001-07:00

I have no idea what's been going on with the blog but comments are now fixed. :)

Yup, it's a Christmas tree :)

2010-11-17T09:10:00.000-07:00

This year, with all that has been going on we decided to add a little cheer to the house and we decorated for Christmas. Daddy put up the tree and we decorated the tree and the apartment. Of course we took turns because mommy needed several breaks to rest but it was a nice time had by all. Tan had a blast, got to put ornaments on the tree and decide where all the extra decorations were going to be put up on the wall. She had a blast being boss for a couple of hours. I will have more pictures of the final outcome soon. We had a blast.

Tan and baby boy sharing a very old music bear

Mommy (hey im in lots of pain, forgive the blah) and Miss Tan

Tan decorating the tree, she had a blast, and yes, most of the ornaments ended up in the same place

Daddy helping Miss T put some ornaments in the back of the tree

Daddy and Miss T decorating the tree

Tan and mommy decorating (no folks I still can't wear real clothes yet)

Miss T wearing Poohs Christmas hat from Disneyland

Oh, my favorite ER

2010-11-15T09:38:00.000-07:00

Yes, I ended up in the ER on Fri. For the first time in a long time, I was freaked out. I have help now at home, but still, hubby called at the right time, I told him what was wrong (will spare the details) and he said he would call me right back. He called said he was on the way home and be ready to go to the ER. As I finally get the call back from my Drs office on call nurse who also said that I needed to go to the ER. So, I get to the ER, in severe pain with other symptoms that are scaring the day lights out of me, they were super quick about everything. They got me triaged and in to a room fast. Then the waiting began. They ran blood tests to make sure that I had no infection and my blood levels were ok, all was good. Then, the pain began. The Dr decided he needed to do an internal exam. So, that was not fun. It hurt extremely bad, as in when he was done it felt like surgery day all over again. When I went to leave I couldn't even walk for the next two days. It turns out that I popped a couple of internal stitches. So, I was on a strict to do-nothing for the next three days, then no heavy lifting again for two more week, and no driving until I am off my pain meds. This whole thing has put me right back to the begining. Oh joys. Thank goodness for all the help at home. The house was empty on Sat so I got a much needed nap. Other than that, we are taking it one day at a time.

Yay, Im finally home

2010-11-08T08:58:00.000-07:00

Well, I had the surgery on Fri morning, was pretty drowsy until late late that night. The hubby came and sat with me for a while but since I was asleep most of the time, he took off to spend some quality time with the babies. I was sent a beautiful bouqet of flowers that I wasn't able to actually visualize until Sat morning. The food at this hospital, amazing! Their menu is like a 5 start hotels. I ate like crazy Fri night, and it was delicious.

this was my dinner the night of my surgery

(i had a breakfast croissant with ham and bacon, piece of cinnamon coffee cake, a cinnamon raisin bagel (for later that night) a banana nut muffin (again for later that night), terimasu cake and tapioca pudding)

It was awesome. I couldn't eat it all, but save the breads for later bc my meds made me sick to my stomach)

Then, Sat morning I ordered what I thought was going to be the best breakfast I've had in a long time and I couldn't even eat it. For some reason severe dizziness and neasousness hit me really bad.

this was breakfast, eggs benedict, oatmeal cookie,terimasu and chocolate milk.

Due to those two little complications I eneded up having to stay Sat night in the hospital too so that I could be monitored. Sat night a friend came and sat with me for a few hours and brought a great DVD to watch while she was there. This person who came and sat with me, her and her husband have a heart of gold. They helped us out way above the call of duty. She's also adopted our children as her own grandchildren. lol. Now our kids have more grandparents then either one of us did, Their 2 real grandpas, my uncle T calls Papa and aunt she calls grandma, and now a whole nother loving set. :) Our children are so blessed. they spoiled baby boy by getting him his first walker and a bumbo to feed him it. :) He loves them both. The walker just happens to be the same one his sister had when she was little too. :)

baby boy in his new walker Miss Tan in her walker 2 yrs ago

Sat while I was in the hospital daddy took Miss T out to get her second haircut. I had decided since I couldn't even reach the end of it to wash it it was high time fror another cut. They only took a couple of inches off and she got it done up too.

So, I am home now. In a lot of pain, still pretty dizzy, feeling blah, but I am so so happy to be home.

Pumpkin carving and trick-or-treating

2010-11-01T09:03:00.000-06:00

Well, this year, we did it. Yay. We carved a pumpkin and went trick-or-treating. When it came to the pumpkin carving Tan wasn't having any of the mess. We tried to get her to put her hand in the pumpkin to help clean it, no way, she freaked out. lol.

For Halloween we went to a friends house. We had a very nice relaxing dinner, went trick-or-treating while Mr Baby got to stay at their house, and then when we got back we helped pass out candy, pop-corn and hot chocolate. It was an amazing and tiring night.

Daddy starting the pumpkin

Miss T so not putting her hands in their lol

Our Pumpkin

Dr. Slice

(we were going to do blood but she wasn't having that this year)

Having fun

Not so sure of all the big decorations yet :)

After her first house

Over all, the night was a huge success and a ton of fun.

One more week

2010-10-28T13:56:00.000-06:00

Ok, yesterday, a lot of good things seemed to line up after weeks and weeks of working with my Drs, insurance and scheduling. I was called yesterday and said that the surgery was approved and we just have to wait for an opening in December, which the schedule isn't out yet. Ok, I think to myself, now I only have to deal with the pain for about two months, deal with recovery and then be done with this damn pain.

Move foward an hour. I get a call from my Drs office scheduler, and yay, she had a cancellation for next Fri and did I want it. Hm, let me think, wait a week, deal with recovery for 6 weeks instead of another two or so months, um, YEAH! So, surgery is on for next Fri. I am so excited, so happy that I will be free of this pain and agony, will be able to get back to life with my babies and my hubby. But oh, how I am so not looking foward to another surgery and spending more time in hospitals. One more week!!!!

We couldn't wait

2010-10-27T08:03:00.000-06:00

Little dudes appetite has become crazy (not that we didn't expect it) so we are starting him on baby food. To say I am excited, is an understatement. He's had a few small meals, but after only one day of trying we are up to eating one whole container at a time. He is a McCammon that's for sure. Just like his sister, loves his food. Here are some pictures from our last couple of experiences. Tan is getting in on the action too, she either gets to try the baby food, like if I tell little dude it's good she wants to try it, or she just talks to him and tries to get him to open his mouth. It's so adorable to watch. I'm loving it!!

His first meal, he wasn't having it

The face says it all

I think he liked the apples better :)

Before breakfast this morning, he saw the jar and tried to grab it out of my hands

After breakfast, he was full and just relaxed for a while (like a typical dude)

Our first fire and random pictures

2010-10-25T07:33:00.000-06:00

The last few days here have been pretty cold at night. This week, however, is going to be even colder. Our lowest this week is going to be 21degrees, with the high being around 55 degrees. Now that, is.pretty.darn.cold. This past weekend it was cold enough to burn our first fire. Tanis loved it and little dude was in awe of it. lol. I can't wait until we are burning a fire each night and each morning. I don't think that's too far away.

We are enjoying the change in seasons so much. We moved here from a place in CA where it was either hot or cold, and their cold, was CO lows during the day. Right now, as I type this, there are gusts of wind outside of over 50mph, leaves are floating everywhere. Oh how pretty it is. Soon, there will be snow everywhere. It will make going places a pain in the butt with the kids, but how nice it will be to look out our windows and see the white fluff all over the place. Not to mention Tan only got a small taste of it last winter and she can't wait to play in the snow. Daddy can't wait to take the kids sledding and having snow fights. I just can't wait to take a ton of pictures of everyone's first time playing in the snow.

It's not big yet, but it was so nice.

The kids were sitting next to daddy on the couch next to the fire

Tan and little dude sitting our bed while I folded laundry, he was having a blast as you can tell

(don't they look so much alike? It amazes me)

My little dude is 5months

2010-10-21T12:52:00.000-06:00

Wow, I can't believe you are 5 months old already. You are weighing almost 18lbs and you are almost 27 inches long. I can't believe how much you have grown in the last 5 months. You are almost able to sit up on your own, you smile all the time, you adore you big sister so so much. When you are playing on the floor fussing all she has to do is sit down next to you, you reach out and grab her, and if she calls your name you squeel with delight. It is so precious to me.

I so hope that you, your sister, and your big brother will always have a great relationship. I grew up with no true siblings, a handful of step siblings that I never really got along with. I hope that no matter what you all go through, how many fights you have, that you all will always be there for each other.

I am anxiously awaiting next month when you turn 6 months and we have the go ahead to start you on baby food. I am so happy and can't wait because that means that you will be able to be sitting at the dinner table with us come Thanksgiving. We are going to have such a great time with you learning how to eat, I can't wait!

I am so proud of how fast you are growing and how smart you are my little dude!!!

That smile makes my heart melt all day long, over and over.

Look at my sad face

2010-10-15T15:08:00.000-06:00

Miss Tan was singing to him and every time she stopped this was the sad face he gave to me and her. Can you say heart breaker?

Half big sisters size

2010-10-13T14:01:00.000-06:00

Yes people he is that big!

Update and little dude

2010-10-07T08:46:00.000-06:00

Yesterday morning I couldn't take the pain anymore so I called to make an appointment to try to get in asap. I did, and I saw an PA. It was pointless, mostly. She went over all my symptoms, history, etc, and then she left the room. She came back, said I have to wait until the 19th when I can see the Dr (which was the one she was talking to), becuase, he wants to talk about a hysterectomy. Im 31 years old and I need to have a hysterectomy. Now, I have to wait or the Drs appointment to see what version it's going to be. The one where they just remove the normal parts, or the one where they remove all the parts and put me into early menopause. Then, with surgery, I have to think about all the side effects of my other conditions. Not only that, if I have the surgery it's a few days stay in the hospital and a long recovery. I'm scared. But it's better than what I've been dealing with the last 4 months. I would rather have a recovery time and know the pain will be gone, than having to be so careful around my babies and not being able to do what I want to do with them.

Now on to little dude. He had his 4 month check up. He was supposed to have it last week but it was the day after I got out of the ER. He is the 80% for height, 75% for weight and same for his head. In the Dr's words "he's huge and so very long". He weighed in at almost 17lbs and was almost 27 inches long. She sked me what size he's wearing and the onsie I had on the table was 9months and it's almost too small. lol. She couldn't believe it. He also got his 4 month shots and this was the first time he actually was so upset for a little while after he got them. Today he's doing ok, just really sleepy.

May 2010 My Baby

June 2010 - 2 Months

July 2010 - 3 Months

August 2010 - 4 Months

September 2010 - 4 1/2 Months

He's huge isn't he...lol.

Littel dude loves playing with his feet...has since he was a month old. Makes him laugh so much he snorts..lol.

Little dude loves talking to his big sister

More medical drama

2010-10-04T09:03:00.001-06:00

I keep asking myself when will this will end? When can I be a normal mother, wife and friend? When can I talk to someone without them having to ask "how are you doing" "have you found anything else out". It's getting really tiring, annoying, and depressing. It seems in the last 6 years, if it's not one thing, it's another.

This "problem" started with the birth of my little baby boy. I was so tender it hurt to hold him, and to this day, it still does. I have to put a pillow on my lap to feed him so he doesn't put too much pressure on my stomach. I have to tell my daughter she can't jump around on mommy because it hurts her tummy too much. She bends over to kiss my tummy and she doesn't yet understand that it's on the inside not the outside. Oh how I love how she tries to fix me when I'm hurt.

About 6 weeks after little dude was born I had the essure put in. I explained to my Dr that I was still so tender it puts me in tears. I was given a depo and told to wait until I have my one month ultrasound for the essure. I went in a month later, and let me tell you, when he did that lovely ultrasound, he kept saying sorry because I was actually crying on the table. He then told me I had a fluid sack on my left ovary and that since the depo shot I have when baby boy was 4 weeks old hasn't done anything, he believes that I have a bad case of endometriosis (which I was told I had when I was 19 years old before I had my first beautiful baby boy). The only way to find that out is to do surgery to go in and look. He said he would check the fluid filled sack in a nother month and that he wanted to wait and see if the second depo did anything for the endometriosis.

Now, jump ahead to last Wed. I have been having my lady problem for over 8 days, and I was in so much pain I was popping my 800mg motrin every four hours. (only supposed to take every 6-8hrs). I called my old OB (I don't have the same insurance so I can't see him, but I wanted to see what he thought that I should do). He wasn't aware that I didn't have the same insurance, and he wanted to do surgery Thursday. I then explained the situation to his nurse who talked to the Dr. He said I needed to get in to see a new ob/gyn asap and if the pain got any worse that I needed to go in to the ER.

The ER is where I spent Thursday night. It turns out, that fluid sack the Dr saw, was an ovarian cysts, and the severe pain, was because it ruptured! And the ER Dr agreed I needed to see my new ob/gyn because he agrees with the endometriosis diagnosis, but they can't do anything about that in the ER except give me pain meds, which I can't take because they will knock me out, and hello, I have a 3yr old and 4month old to take care of at home. I called my Drs office Thur morning and have yet to hear back. They have 24-48hrs to call me back to arrange for a referall to the Womans center, while I sit here in pain. Beaurocratic red tape, it stinks.

If I do get in, if they do decide I have endometriosis it depends on how bad it is. First, they have to just go in and look, then if it's so-so, they take some of the scar tissue out, but, if it's pretty bad, then they have to do a hysterectomy. Not something I want to happen, or even want to think about right now. That means amongst the rest of my thryoid hormone problems, I would be shot through menopause at 31 years old.

So, here I sit, with aunt flow on day 15, severe pain, not a thing I can do, waiting for the Dr to call me back. Sitting here cuddling and loving on my babies to try to take my mind off of everything and just thanking God for my children and so very understanding husband.

Quick update

2010-09-21T14:22:00.000-06:00

Well, today my little man turns 4 months old. I can't beleive he's 4 months already. Seems like yesterday we got him home after what seemed like forever. He's gotten so big so quickly. He's over 16lbs, and he's already wearing 9 month clothes. (he's long just like his big sister).

We have now been in our apartment for 6 days. Let's just say the move didn't go as planned. If anything bad could've happened, it did. First, we were supposed to have a w/dryer in our apartment and when we did the walk through. (imagine, i had a lot of 6 month old blankets to wash, about 3 tubs worth of clothes, not to mention all the stuff from my uncles house) the w/dryer was missing. Turns out it was given to someone else. So, our office staff called someone to get us one to rent. We then had to come up with a deposit for this company, oh, and it wouldn't be until the next day for them to deliver the set. Then our dishwasher flooded the kitchen, the next day, dryer doesn't work, sprinklers are flooding our bedroom, w/dryer guy put a hole in our linoleum in the bathroom, a window spring breaks first day here, and so on and so forth.

Right now, all is well. We are loving the new apartment. The management has proven to be quick to respond to all assistance we need and are very nice about it. Our apartment has been newly painted and has new carpet. This is the first apartment we have had with new carpet. We love it. Our apartment also has a window A/C and a fireplace. Now, the fireplace is normal but the A/C isn't. This is making me one happy momma!

I will update with pictures as soon as possible, however right now my hands are full with a little girl, baby boy, laundry and finding a place for everything. (which is nearly impossible lol)

Please pray...and if you can, donate

2010-09-12T09:16:00.000-06:00

Hailey is such a beatiful smiling little girl. I am asking you to take a look at her mothers blog and you will see she is, sadly, also a very sick little girl. Her family is need of support, prayers, and if possible any donations you can make. They have some very big medical bills, and very soon they are going to have to take a very expensive trip to help Hailey get the care she needs.
I ask you, if you can, please help this family.
Thank you.

So much change...

2010-09-09T09:30:00.000-06:00

There has been so much going on in the last month. So many ups and downs, it's been crazy. Tan had her birthday at the begining of Aug, then the hubbies, and mine was last weekend. The baby boy is just over 3 months old, already standing up (with assistance of course) but, people, my 3 month old little boy, is taking steps. (again, while assisted). This means that within the next few weeks-months he will be walking or crawling. This little dude is growing way too fast. But the other fabulous gift he has given me, he is starting to sleep through the night. I didn't get this gift from either one of our other children before they were about 6 months old or so. He started about 2 weeks ago. I am so in need of the sleep, and so thankful he's giving it to me.

Next week we are finally moving in to our own place. It's so exciting. We have been staying with family the whole time we have been here and they have been nothing but absolutely supportive and accepting. In other words, they have been the awesome! However, we are so happy to be able to now have our own space. The kids will have their own room, our new place has an awesome fireplace, and its huge. We are so excited.
The kids are doing great. Tan is getting bigger and still as stubborn as all get up. Her words are getting better and she's soo smart. Michael is doing good. He's so tall and skinny now. Hubby is doing great and loving his job. As for me, well, there is still alot going on, both physically and medically. Only time shall tell.

All my beautiful children

My big boy and my little girl

Me and my big boy

Both my angle boys, young and old

My little girl loving her nutella

The Bug...ugh

2010-08-20T13:41:00.000-06:00

We have been hit by our first virus of the year and wouldn't you know, the two littles ones got hit the hardest. Daddy and I just have a little bit of the yuckies. Little T woke up about 2 days ago in the middle of the night with 105 temp and baby boys was at 102 and rising. Luckily Tan only has the blahs along with the fever, but little man has it all. He's been vomiting for the last week or so, can't sleep, super crabby, and the fever hit him right after Tan. I can't wait for this pass. The good thing is, it's only been about 2 days for the fever and it seems to be running its course. As for the baby, we shall see.

My sick little man

My sickly little girl, looks at those red cheeks

She didn't even want her picture taken

This is the smile I want back on his face!

And the smile I want back on hers

She's 3...where did the time go???

2010-08-05T09:50:00.000-06:00

I look at her and I can't believe that she is now 3 years old. It still seems like yesterday that we were fighting to have to her, to bring her into this world. Now, she's so big and it sucks sometimes. She's gotten so tall and so big so fast, I feel like I missed the "little girl" phase. Hey, I am mommy and she's my only daughter okay. :)

She really has gotten so big over the last year and the changes in her and her personality have been huge and great. She's still very indipendent, she's so loving and caring with her baby brother, she loves talking to people when we are out and about, and she has such a huge heart. If she sees mommy crying she's the first one to bring tissue and says "wipe", or if I need something for brother she's the first one to say "me get, me get". I love it, and I've loved every minute of watching her grow up.

Next thing I know, she'll be in school, then elementary school, then high school, AAAHHHHH! Never mind, I'm not going there. I just can't believe my little girl is three already.

Tan on her way home from the hospital

Tan's 1st Birthday

Tans 2nd Birthday, look at those cheeks

(they're gone now :( )

Tan on her 3rd Birthday

Tan and brother, they are both getting so big so fast!!!

Happy Birthday baby girl, we love you so much!!!

2 Months today

2010-07-21T12:04:00.000-06:00

Wow, I can't believe that it was 2 months ago that I delivered my 3rd and last little angel. He has been through so many drastic ups and down and he's grown so much I can't believe it. He was my biggest little one at birth, weighing in at 7.88lbs, he went down to almost 5lbs, and now, at 2 months old, he weighs in at 11.14lbs. He has been, by far, the fastest one to gain weight. He's almost out of 3 month clothes. (at least the onsies, not the pants because of course, like the rest of my children, he's skinny).

Baby and daddy first night home (4 days old)

Tan and little brother (4 days old)

My little boy at 2 months old

(he looks like his daddy 100%, and his hair is turning red)

Tan with baby at 2 months old

The other thing I recently realized, was that my husband can never deny these are his children. Not only do they both look just like him, I was looking at pics of Tan when she was a newborn, and the kids look like twins at birth.

Tan a couple days old at home

Baby boy first day home

(besides the difference in skin tone, they both had different levles of jaundice, they look the frigging same)

Update and pictures

2010-07-21T10:29:00.000-06:00

Well, not much has been going on here. Life's been different every day. Since our last update:

Our truck, that is only three years old, was in the shop for almost 2 weeks. It had to have a complete transmission rebuild. I had a rental car I fell in love with. It was a Chevy HHR, and it got fabulous gas mileage. Not only that, we all fit in to it so nicely. However, we have decided with all the troubles, there will be no more Chevy's bought for us.

Tan had a blast at her first baseball game. (not really her first but first one she actually paid attention to lol). We went because my uncle was presenting the flags at the game. She shouted for papa (she calls my uncle papa because my little cousin does) and then was exstatic when he sat buy us. Due to the fact they were playing a double header we ended up only staying until the start of the second game, but it was fun to watch her scream "go guys" when everyone would yell.

Tan and daddy when we first got the field

Tan, daddy and my uncle

My uncle walking the flag

She's almost 3 but the size of a 7 year old!!!

2010-07-07T13:10:00.000-06:00

I took Tan to her first Drs apt a week or so ago. She's averaging top 90% on everything, but I didn't realize how tall she was until recently. She was being babysat by a nice lady with 4 boys. Two of them were twin 7yr olds and Tan was as tall as they were. Then, pictured here, we went to the furniture store to look for abunk bed and she sat in adult size bean bag chair. Please tell me whatyou think, but I don't think she looks frigging two!!!

Family trip to Cheyenne Mountain Zoo

2010-07-07T10:51:00.000-06:00

On Monday my aunt and uncle took us to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo. It's Colorado Springs little zoo, although it's not as little as everyone makes it sound. Tan had a hold of my uncle the whole time we were there. She wanted nothing to do with daddy or mommy, which was just fine with my uncle, or as Tan calls him, papa. :) I honestly don't know who had more fun, mommy or Tan. lol. The little guy just hung out and slept in the carrier the whole time.

After the zoo, we took a little drive through the zoo up to the Will Rogers Shrine of the Sun. Talk about high, and we are all afraid of heights. lol. We didn't actually climb the shrine, but the view from the zoo and even further up at the Shrine was fantastic.

Here are a ton of pictures we took while at the zoo. (and that's not even half of them)

The giraffes, they walk straight up to you and lick the crackers out of your mouth

My cousin L and Tan watching the giraffes before we got a closer look

Aunt holding Tan trying to get her to feed the giraffe, cousin L feeding it

The giraffe wanted to say hi to Tan but she wasn't having it

I did, however, pet the giraffe, it's actually pretty smooth

Mommy and baby boy

Cousin L feeding a gorgeous blue bird

(it's an inside area about the size of an average living room)

Papa holding Tan so she can feed the birds

An orangutan posing for the cameras

Papa and Tan is a huge yard chair in the childrens section titled My Huge BackYard

Tan talking to a statue of a lioness

There was a section that had a mama, baby and daddy orangutan. Daddy gave us a show by climbing all the way to the top of the enclosure. Baby tried to follow but could never make it

This is the view of Colorado Springs from the highest point of the zoo

View from the Shrine, that's Colorado Springs and then the plains that surround us

Happy Fourth of July

2010-07-07T10:11:00.000-06:00

Happy Fourth of July from our house to yous.

We didn't do much, no fireworks, (except for all the great illigal ones around our house) other than that, nothig out of the normal. Tan wasn't too in to the loud noises so off to bed she went.

The Dentist sucks!!!

2010-06-29T09:28:00.000-06:00

Wow, ok, for those of you who know, I've had a problem tooth for some time now. It was super infected, with the root exposed the whole time I was pregnant so I was unable to do anything about it.

That changed yesterday, as in, I-HAD-IT-PULLED!

OUCH!!!!!! It took the dentist 7shots of two different kinds of meds to numb me enough to pull the darn thing. Funny thing is after all that drama with the numbing, it literally took one minute to pull the thing. One year or pain for one minute, funny how things work out huh.

I am not feeling so hot right now, but the dentists said that it should be a day or two and the tooth site shouldn't hurt, however, since he did have to give me so many shots, my jaw is going to be very sore and bruised for the next week or so. Joy!
So, I've been starving for a day and a half now, can only have liquids and slimfast has become my best friend, and it's not that great. lol

Will update more later. Little dude and big sister are doing really good, big sister is helping me out with little dude, and being great!

Is there anyone out there with good suggestions for colicy babies?

A lot of sisterly love :)

2010-06-08T12:52:00.000-06:00

Tanis absolutely adores holding the little dude. No matter where we are or what we are doing, if the urge to hold him hits, she asks. Now, most of the time I tell her to wait until we get home and she's ok with that. Yesterday she was a holding freak. I only snapped two pitures though because I am weary of even turning around. She's such a great big sister.

Random thoughts and an update

2010-06-04T10:39:00.000-06:00

So, the little dude is getting bigger and better right now. He had his check up last Tue and he was finally back up to his birth weight, so that was a great milestone. The bili-bed can dehydrate the little ones so that's why he wasn't gaining any weight. He has also grown 1/2". Still too small for most of his 0-3 month clothes, but we wear them anyway.

A for me, I'm still having "tummy" issues. Went in and Dr "thinks" I have an infection in my U so she put me on antibiotics. We shall see if it helps. The pain sucks, can't really set the little dude on my stomach, it hurts to potty, laugh, cough, etc. I take 3 prescription motrins a day, and I hate doing that. The good thing is since I'm not breast feeding anymore I don't have worry about passing it all on to him. My blood pressure is down, YAY!, and my weight is down by almost 28lbs, so that's even better. Still have to wear my maternity pants, but that's pretty much because I don't want to buy clothes, and I need to wait until my hips come back in a lttle bit. lol.

Tanis is loving having the little brother around. She so good with him, she just moves too fast for mommy. Scares me sometimes, and with the lump on the little ones head we have to be really careful. (the lump is from me having to stop all pushing because he was ready to come out and there was no Dr to deliver him).

Littel dude sitting in my lap, Tan holding his hands

Boy of boy did I forget what it's like to get absolutely no.sleep.what.so.ever. Since we switched to formula it's been a little.bit.better, but not much. He wakes up about every 1-25 hrs. Hoping to get some sleep very soon. Luckily for me though, on the weekends, daddy takes over so mommy can at least get a couple of naps in during the day. You see, the sad thing is, even if daddy were to take over at night a couple of times, I'm such a control freak and worry wart that I would be up and there with him anyways. :) So for now, he's just my helper at night and makes sure I don't fall asleep with little man in my hands. lol.

Tanis wed after going to lunch with my cousin :)

cuddle time last Sat am

Daddy and son

1 week of craziness

2010-05-28T11:51:00.000-06:00

So, the little one has been sick the whole time we've been home. He had an apt on Tue, and the Dr agreed with me that he looked a little jaundice. He didn't think by the looks of him it was anything to worry about. Apparently we were wrong because the tests came back that he had to have a bili-bed because he was only 3 points away from being put in the hospital.

We didnt get the bed until almost 8pm. By this time my little man was so lethargic that I couldn't get him to eat more than 2minutes without just passing out, and when we put him in the bed he was completely inconsolable. I was scared. I called the Drs office and the nurse that answered told me to deal with it until I told her he hasn't eaten a decent meal in like 7 hrs. She told me to take him to the ER. I did, and the Dr has the same crappy attitude. His levels were the same. She told me to go home, deal with it, and that was that. I told her that I couldn't get him to eat, etc and she said try harder. I freaked, I started to cry. She just walked out of the room and sent a nurse in. (the whole time I'm on the phone the Dr is out at the nurses station actually talking crap about me, like I can't hear since I have the huge room right in front of the station with just a curtain up) She was saying that maybe she should call a psych eval for me, that they don't do things for kids just because mommy can't deal. What the heck people, really. I was a scared shitless mom whose child didn't even move at all the pocking prodding or shots, and I'm not aloud to be a little emotional. Screw you lady!

Anyways.

My nurse called up to the NICU and the nurse I talked to there was so nice, so caring and understanding. Gave exact directions on what to do, told me that first and foremost we both needed our rest. His levels arent horrible, so she said to feed him a little formula after each breast feed to help him poop, which is what he needs to do to remove the bili from his system. So I did it, didn't get much sleep, but all was a little better. He has been in the bili bed for almost 4 days now, seems to be doing better. Waiting on the test results for today to see if we can discontinue this dreaded bed. He has to spend almost all day in it, and because of the light and the bed I can't leave his side. It sucks. Here are some pics from his first trip to the Drs office and him in his fancy bili-bed.

In his carseat at first Drs apt

The ER

My Little man in his bili-bed

Having a baby & taking my blog back

2010-05-28T11:23:00.000-06:00

Ok, first off I know I keep going back and forth on this subject, however, I have decided that no matter how many nasty emails I am bound to get for now giving information to each individual person, I am taking my blog back. It is my space, for my family and friends that care.

So, please everyone, welcome me in introducing the world to our new bundle of joy, our new son. He was born on Fri, May 21st, 2010 at 12:32pm, weighing in at 7.88lbs, 20in long

I was sent in on Thur to be induced. I have two pills (each was 4hrs) inserted, then they started pitocin in the am. At 8am my Dr broke my water my contractions went out of control, so they lowered the pitocin (was already on a really low drip), then they still wouldn't stop. They weren't coming down to where they were supposed to, meaning they NEVER STOPPED! At 3cm I was able to get an epidural. Let me tell you, that was the best thing EVER! My first one that finally worked and actually took away the pain. LOVED IT!!! Then, at about 11:15 the nurse came in to check me, I was 7cm, and she said that I should be ready in about two to three hours, (theory is 1cm per hour) and that the Dr had to go across the street to get his phone because he was on call. Then at about 11:45 I had Adam call the nurse in and told her that I had "that pressure" and I needed to push NOW! She simply said lets check you, although I wouldnt doubt that you still have a ways to go. She checked, looked up, and said wow, you are complete and ready to go. She said lets try a push and see how you do. I did, and she told me to stop right now. That we needed to try to wait for the Dr to get there. Well, our son had a different idea. He was going to push his way into this world if he had to. The nurse called the Nurse Stationed, asked for additional nurses to be in there just in case he came before the Dr did and to notify the Dr. The Dr just happened to walk in the room right then, and less than three contractions later our son was born.

However, he was born with some breathing problems. I got to hold him for about 2 minutes before daddy, a nurse, and my son went to the nursery. He was then given a bath and put on oxygen. While I was being moved to my new room, I was told he was having a lung exray and that it would be a little longer before he was back in our room. By this time I hadn't seen him for almost 2 hours. Let me tell you, it scared me big time to not hear my child cry when he was born, or for a day after he was born. We could get barely a whimper out of him. Not only did we have him to worry about, I was bleeding pretty bad. From the time I had the baby to that night, I had passed several HUGE blood clots to the point where they had to put me on medicine to stop the bleeding. Then all Fri night I had a fever, weird severe chills and extreme hot sweats. Nothing I have ever had before. So, to say the least we ended up staying until Sun afternoon.
Here are some random pictures from the hospital, and then on to my next post.

Tans first kiss :)

Delivery night

1 Week after baby

This is a very hard decision...Goodbye for now

2010-05-19T14:21:00.000-06:00

This is a decision that has been long in the making. As a lot of you know, I have a ton of family drama. Even more just came up today. Seems a very past step mother is now trying to find me. I have family that is still talking nonsense behind my back, people doing and saying things they shouldn't. I am no longer in high school, I have my own family to think of.

Due to this, and the drama that seems to have followed me across state lines, I am putting my blog on hold for a little while. I don't like having to sensor myself, not post pictures or say something because I don't want someone to see it.

I have a little one due to be here any day, a 2 year old at home to take care of, and my own health to worry about. I can not and will not tollerate any more drama affecting my family.

For those of you that have my email, please feel free to email me. I do not want to shut everyone out, just the ones I don't want knowing anything. Sadly, this is a very public place, so for now, I need to take my life out of the public eye.

I want to thank you all for all your support, comments, love and understanding. Hope to be back soon.
Hugs to all!

Update & Trip to the Park

2010-05-17T08:08:00.000-06:00

This last week was a bad Drs apt. We are looking at our options very soon. The little one is estimated to be weighing in (last Thur) at a little over 7 1/2lbs. That's huge people. This scares me very very much. However, at this point, I just can't wait for this pregnancy to be over. We can't get a handle on the blood pressure with meds, my weight is still doing really good, my contractions are ALL the time, but there has been no "down there" change. Praying it all happens very soon. If I take a leave of absence for a while, you will know then. :)

These past two weeks we have all been very sick, so this weekend, those of us that weren't went out. We made a stop at a local park and Tan loved it. Oh how my daughter is the little daredevil and loves the really high slides. Thank goodness daddy went up there, there was no way big old mommy was going to make it. lol.

Tan loved playing on the rings and the monkey bars

this slide scared mommy....

She loved the swings, and actually jumped off once

A very good weekend.

Happy Mothers Day & almost

2010-05-09T08:26:00.001-06:00

First, I want to say Happy Mothers Day out there to all you fantastic wonderful mothers. You all know you are, and today is the day to celebrate yourself and your children. I pray you all have a wonderful day filled with love, smiles and happiness!!

So, we were hoping that we would have a Mothers Day baby. Here's why:

I went in for my normal Drs apt on Fri. First, ultrasound showed that little one turned. Yup, you got it. This late in the game the little one decided it was time to turn from the correct position to the breech position. (yes, uh-oh was my only thought). Then when it was time for monitoring, I was having nice little contractions every 2-4 minutes. No big deal there, nothing different in the last month for me. Then, went in and my blood pressure was still high. This time they wouldn't even give me the number. scary. lol

So, Dr comes in, we chat. I ask him about the contractions, (they aren't changing anything so far so he has labeled them "annoying contractions". Then, I asked him if what to do about the baby now being in the breech position. He said normally at this point they would just give them a little time to turn around, but since I can go in to labor at any minute (even though the contractions aren't doing anything this minute doesn't mean they can't change) and he's not going to stop labor if I do start, that he was going to send me over to L&D and have an external External cephalic version. Ok, that scared me. I've seen those done on tv and they don't look very comfortable. So, I have some blood tests ran and head over to L&D. Since I was having a procedure done, I had to have an IV started just in case. There was a chance that doing the procedure would put me in to labor or cause an emergency c-section. I was actually hoping that it would cause me to go in to labor. I love this baby, but I am so ready for it to be over. So, two hours later, the Dr grabs the ultrasound machine and the mineral oil getting ready to see where baby is and start the moving. Then, the little stinker moved back into the correct position within the three hours from the ultrasound to the L&aD. What? I told the Dr if this little one is giving me this much trouble now, it better be an angel when it gets here. lol. So, I was happy no procedure but sad because there will be no Mothers Day baby for me.

However, I now have an answer on what is going to happen. After sitting in the L&D for so long, I only had 2 normal blood pressures, the rest of them were still high. (laying down it was still about 138/90-102). so, the Dr said that as long as no protein continues to show up then I will be setting a date next Thur for the following week for an induction. I am so happy. Only 1 week and 4 days until I am 37 weeks and we welcome this little one home!

My husband said that when I left to go to the Drs and didnt come home on time Tan was very upset and crying. So, we have come to this conclusion. Even if she is in the waiting room, comes in and out of the room to check on mommy and baby, Tan is going to be at the hospital as much of the time as possible. She is so envolved, she rubs mommies tummy when she has a contraction at home, asks "mommy, baby ok?" and she wipes my tears away and says "ok mommy!" when I cry. I know I could always use her extra support in the room.

Lastly I am going to post some current pictures of the baby. If you don't like prego bellies it's time to switch to another blog. I am going to give you all an inside view of the HUGE baby belly I am carrying around.
Yes, I just woke up from a nap, and wasn't ready for the Dr's apt yet.

35 weeks

It's way bigger than it looks under clothes

34 Week Update

2010-05-03T07:50:00.000-06:00

Well then seems this is going to be a nother bumpy ride.

Had my Dr's appointment this past Thursday. First, the ultrasound went great. There is alot of extra fluid so this little one has a ton of space to move around yet. Then, went for monitoring. Contractions every 3-4 minutes. Let me tell you, they suck. They are painful and constant. (and no, they are confirmed not to be braxton hicks). As I waited for my Dr I was weighed (yay have only gained about 30lbs so far-a world record for me) but this time my blood pressure was up to 158/119. So the nurse that took it said she didn't like it, please wait about 15minutes and she was going to have my normal nurse come in and take it. After about 15 minutes she came in, and it was still 158/108. Not good. Dr said that I needed to add a nother blood pressure pill to my daily routine. Oh boy. I am so scared about taking all these meds while I'm pregnant. I know most of them won't harm the baby, but now I am taking my thyroid meds, my tons of calcium, potassium, a calcium prescription, iron pills, pre-natal pills, and now 3 pills of 250mg of blood pressure meds. Dr wants us to make it to at least 36 weeks (two weeks from appointment).

If my blood pressure doesn't lower and we can't control it, then it's looking towards induction. I am hoping that's the case. I am still 1cm and 50%, so my body would take to an induction. I would love to avoid a c-section, not just because it's surgery, but because there are way too many complications to worry about for me to have surgery. As long as this little one doesn't grow too much faster in the next couple weeks, we should be ok. We get to find out the estimated weight next week, but Dr said this little one should be coming in at about 7-71/2lbs. Bother my children were right aroudn 7lbs so that would be a great weight to stay at. lol.

From now on it's a waiting game. I'm just trying not to lose my marbles playing. I can't wait for this little one to be here, to finally hold my baby, and not have to worry so damn much all day long, each and every day.

If you have something to say, just say it already!

2010-04-30T08:17:00.001-06:00

Why do we, as adults, feel the need to leave nasty comments on our myspace page or facebook page, but never actually say who we are talking about, or tell that person what we are really thinking.

Recently (or should I say all my life) I have been part of drama. Last night I found out from a relative that a person, (who is related to a relative of mine) whom I knew would do this, has left a smarmy comment on her myspace page about me, of course without saying it's actually me. Although, we all know it is.

If you have something to say, why don't you just come out and say it to the person you are talking about. Are you afraid of a confrontation, afraid that it's the truth and you are the one lying through your teeth, afraid of realizing that you are the true problem, please do tell. Or just tell me what your damn problem is.

When I was told this, my first instinct was to write this person a nasty email telling them exactly what I think, but that's already been said and done and I would just be hitting a brick wall. Not only that, I don't want to stoop to that persons level. That's just not my style. So, I am taking to my space and my blog and venting. Then, I will let it go. It's not worth my time or my effort anymore. I'm done. I'm very sad, because this person is related to the one person who was supposed to always stand up for me, and be there for me, but it is what it is. Maybe he doesn't know she's doing this, but I'm sure he knows how she feels.

Thursday's Dr's Apt & Fri L&D Drama

2010-04-26T08:33:00.000-06:00

(warning: this is a long post)

Thursday Dr's Appointment

So, I had my 33 week Dr's appointment on this past Thursday. Not much has changed. The ultrasound came out great, there was extra fliud in their for the little one and the breathing is fabulous! Yay. Still getting much bigger ahead of time..
Then, NTS monitoring. Contraction after contraction. Hmm, duh, nothing out of the norm for me, but you know how Dr's are. Never believe you until they have proof.

Dr did an exam, I was 50% thinned out but not dialated or anything and he said since the fetal fybronectin came out negative a week ago (that's a test that tells you that you have a high or low posability to deliver in the next two weeks) so he said that all looks good and we will re-do the test next week. However, he didn't like all the contractions I was having. So, he put me on an additional medication. Told me to go home and take two pills to start then take 1 pill every six hours to keep the contractions down. I went downstairs to pick up the meds at the Walgreens. (it's awesome having a pharmacy in your medical building). Dr said that if I make it past 37 weeks the c-section will be scheduled for 39weeks. I will have another ultrasound in two weeks from now to see how big baby is, if baby is big, and I go in to labor, I will still have to have a c-section. Oh joy.

Then I proceeded to go home. Did I mention, that my first appointment was at 3, it's not almost 6pm, and by the time I got home, ate dinner and went to read the pamphlet that came with the meds it was almost 7pm. I pulled out the pamphlet and read the first line. "Calcium beta blocker". Shit, WTH, do Dr's not think, is my first thought. So, since the Dr is on call that night I called the nurse line. She said that her book didn't tell her how much of a beta blocker it was but it should be ok to take the first dose and call the Dr in the am to confirm. At this point, the answer wasn't good enough for me and hubby, so I opted not to take the first dose until I actually got ahold of someone in the office. So, I will call them Fri am.

Friday's (and Sat am drama)

So, I get up Fri am and call and leave a message with Drs office, supposedly his nurse. I call back at about 2pm because I have had no return call. I leave a nother message. About an hour or so later (I was out at this point with my cousin) and they said that the Dr said that it wasn't enough of a blocker to worry about it so please take your first dose tonight. So, I took it after Tan went to bed. (that way daddy could watch me for any reactions). About an hour after I took said meds I went to get in the shower. I looked down and from my knees down I was lobster red and my feet were super swollen, like I had just hiked 20 miles. You touched one spot and that spot would look ghost white. Ok, I figured since I had been off my feet all day then went out for 45 mins it caused a little swelling. (yeah my brains not that clear these days). After my shower hubby and I sat down to watch Avatar together. About another 30 mins later I started to get a really bad headache. Read the pamphlet on meds and a side effect is mild headache. So I took some tylenol, and at the end of movie told hubby I needed to go to bed because my head was hurting too much.

At about midnight I woke up in excrutiating pain. I tell you it was like someone was slamming my whole head in a car trunk, more like a semi-truck trunk. I took another two tylenol and tried with all my might to give them time to kick in. At about 1:45am I couldn't take it anymore. I call the nurse hotline, crying my eyes out (which only hurt more) and tell them what is going on. She tells me to go straight to L&D because I am having an allergic reaction to the medication I started. So, I am crying my head off, wake up hubby and daughter and they take me to L&D. (oh, did I mention that the hospital is on the other side of town, we were having a good winter storm, and there was ice, winds up to 50mph and snow) yeah, it was fantastic to be driving in it at 2am)

I get there, get all hooked up, my blood pressure is sky high (140's/96) for the whole 3 hours I am there. I am having a lot of contractions, and it's only getting worse because of the pain. By this point the pain is so bad I'm not feeling hot in the stomach department either. The nurse asked me on a scale of 1-10 how bad was the pain. I told her 20. She said I had to choose between 1-10. Said 1 is no big deal, 10 is surgery. I told her if I could have surgery to remove my head right now, I would. She just smiled at me. So, the Dr on call gave me some anti-vomitting meds (oooh that was nice) and some migraine drugs. Doubled the first dose, waited an hour, gave me a single dose, then one more hour a nother single dose to be on my way home. With the warning that because this was an allergic reaction the headache will be there for a day or two. Continue taking tylenol every 4hrs until the second day, then every 6. Oh, and the nurse did an exam, and, bam! I am 1cm and 40%. They told me not to worry about it since this is my third baby and all, but just watch the contractions until my next Drs appointment. Next Thursday.

The headache is a litte better now. Still really exhausted. We didn't do much this weekend, and Tan was fabulous through the whole thing. Will now have to tell the Dr that I am no longer taking the meds, going to tell him that he needs to start the steroids now because I know this baby will be here way sooner than it should be. I know the Dr won't like that, being all "we need to wait and crap" but after the last two babies i have had, I am so tired of Dr's not listening to me, and just doing what needs to be done.

Your supposed to be my friends & family

2010-04-23T07:51:00.001-06:00

I am so tired of all the drama. I thought that with us moving our little family closer to family that actually cares more (and to a whole nother state) it would be better and wouldn't reach us on a daily basis. However, I was so wrong.

I am so so tired of people saying how much they love you, care about you, etc, and then, bam!

I recently found out that a lot of family members and friends in CA have said some not nice things since we have left. Why??!!!

Now, I knew a few peoples feelings before we left. Some simply said that we had to do what was best for our family, etc. Then, one person I talked to, didn't talk to me for a few weeks. When I asked said person why, she said "when you told me you were leaving I was really upset, but now I realize you have to do what's best for your family". This said person is a sweetheart, but really. I'm tired of watching my tongue. This said person is a family friend, and her family has been since way before I was born. However, I never hear from them or talk to them or anything, EVER. What right does that give them to make me feel like crap? None.

These people are people (family and friends) that never take initative or anything.

When I have to be the one to call you ALL THE TIME, I'm the only one emailing, I'm the one that has to practically beg to see you, except for holidays of course, what gives you the right to complain about my decisions for myself and my family. NONE damnit! I don't want to hear that family is best for my children. What good it is to have so called "family" around if you never see them and when you do, it's all drama.

I do have to say that I do miss these people, really I do, but I am so tired of it. I am 30 years old, I have two beautiful children with one on the way, and yet I still feel like I'm 5 years old and everyone is trying to run my life.

Then, there's my father. Not a lot of what has happened is public. If you know me, you know about him. Simply put. Before I left CA I wrote my father a really long letter explaining a lot of things to him, things that I have never said. At that point I told him that I didn't want to see or talk to him before I left because I knew there would be drama, with him and his wife. I'm pregnant and don't need the confrontation. It's been almost a month and a half, and I have had no word from him. NONE! This is probobly what saddens me the most. The one person I thought I had left, and I don't even seem to be worth it. I guess it is what it is.

Anyways, not sure what the point of this post is but to vent my feelings. I'm just so tired of being the one to do all the work to make a relationship last. I'm mentally exhausted with this. At this point I just don't know what to do, and I just don't care anymore.

For those of you that do still write to me, thank you very much for you support and love. Believe me, right now, it's greatly appreciated.

32 Weeks, let the fun begin!

2010-04-16T08:01:00.000-06:00

Wow, it's hard to think I've made it this far already. 32 weeks. It's been a very mupy rough road, and we are almost there. I started the post this am, without knowing that all the shit was going to hit the fan again, so soon.

Today, I started my weekly visits. They consist of me first going to get an ultrasound done to check the baby, the weight, and the fluid. Then, I go sit in this really comfy recliner and get monitored for what's supposed to be 10-15 mins, but leave it to me to "concern" the Dr and have to sit there for 30 minutes. I was having too many contractions and the baby wasn't responding the way they wanted it to. So, then back to the ultrasound room to check baby and see if the little one is doing the "spontanious practice breathing", which the good thing is, the baby is doing. They say that this gives the little one a better chance if they have to get the baby out early. The other thing, this baby is weighing in at 5.8lbs. For those of you who don't know, I am only 32 weeks along, TODAY! That weight brings the babies due date down to almost May 21st, although we all know the Drs wont actually change the due date. However, I was informed if I even carry this one through 37 weeks, it can be weighing in at about 8-10lbs. If that is the case, I will be having a c-section. This, scares.the.crap.out.of.me! I was hoping it wouldn't be so. I saw a nurse practioner today, however, I get to see my Dr at next weeks apt and I believe he will tell me the same thing since that's what his notes told the NP. Now, it's time to freak out!

Well, I saw the NP after the monitoring and back and forth to the ultrasound room. Now, my blood pressure was too high. So, she made me hang out for a while, and re-took it. Still too high. I was then told I need to go across the parking lot to L&D and be monitored. Oh joy. I told her I had to go home and get hubby and daughter first because I had the only vehichle. She said I had 30 minutes. I called the hubby, he said uncle just got home and told him to leave the little one at home. I drove home, picked up hubby and went back to the hospital. When I was at home I tried to explain to T where I was going but she just kept jumping up and down saying "baby...baby...baby". lol. Can you tell she can't wait. lol.

We got to the hospital and got to the see the monitoring rooms for the first time. They are the only rooms we didn't get to see on the tour. They aren't bad. They are about the size of an ER room, but with their own private bathroom and they all have TV's. We were lucky enough, this time, to only be there for about 3 hours. I was put on the monitors, having mild (tell that to my stomach) contractions about every 5 minutes, drank water, etc but nothing stopped them. They did an "exam" and a swab to make sure I had no protein internally and all was good. No changes so we got to go home with the note that if they continue or get worse, blah blah blah to come back. Yeah, like that's going to happen. They don't understand at this point, to me, these are all normal. So, I shall see my Dr next week, get more info on baby, if/when to schedule the damn c-section, and go from there.

Here are some pics taken this am. I am huge! My large shirts don't fit anymore, but that's ok. I'm comfy lol.

Scary front view lol

My big baby belly

Please pray for Hailey, her family & her Drs

2010-04-09T09:14:00.000-06:00

This precious little girl Hailey and her family have had a rough go of it. Right now, she's not doing good at all, the Dr's can't get a handle on it, and to boot she has an IV cath flowing through her blood veins. Please, pray, cross your finger, what ever it is you do, but send this family some love. May God watch over them and her Dr's!

Please read her moms blog and leave some love and support for her. Thank you.

Happy Easter

2010-04-06T08:47:00.000-06:00

I hope everyone had a great Easter. We are missing Michael very much, but he said he had a good Easter. (with the exception of the earth quake he felt that he said scared him pretty good)

Sat we got up and colored some eggs with Aunt Barbara to take the VFW for an egg hunt, and Sunday we got up and Tanis got to have her Easter Basket. All in all it was a pretty relaxing and nice weekend.

Tan & Aunt Barbara coloring eggs

Tan taking over coloring the eggs lol

Tan decorating the eggs with stickers

They had a stack of stuffed animals and each child got to take one home. Tan chose a little baby duck. And our new word for the weekend was of course, "bunny"

Tan running for eggs lol

Tan telling her cousin Lucky to hurry up, and yelling "show papa" (my Uncle Bobby lol) She calls him papa because Lucky calls him papa (which he is to him lol)

Tan's Easter Basket

She was so happy for the glove. (and of course so was daddy)

Ahh, sidewalk chalk to make a kid smile :)

Tan & daddy trying out the glove

Please Pray

2010-03-29T09:30:00.000-06:00

I follow a blog, Riggs Family Blog Please pray for this family, their little beautiful girl Abby, and the Dr's. If you don't pray please just send good joojoo's, anything. This family has been through so much with their children, and today Abby is having surgery. Abby has cancer, has been having a lot of breathing problems and they just got news that it's not great, and she is getting very sick with pneumonia and will have to stay in the hospital.

If you would like to read today's post please click here: Abby Update - Not Really Good News

Wow, 29 weeks

2010-03-29T08:36:00.000-06:00

Ok, well, I was going to post pics of what we have for the baby so far, then, duh, I realized that would so totally give away what the sex is. So, can't do that. Silly me. (hey, call it pregnancy brain). Tan is seeing all the stuff, helping us out big time, and so can't wait for baby to come home. I went to the Dr's last week. She kept asking where I was and daddy said at Dr's having baby checked out. I came home, came down stairs, and she asked "baby at?" How cute is that?!

Well, Tan does have a special shirt she gets to wear the day the "new baby" comes home. She's excited for sure.

Here is a pic of me, taken today, at 29 weeks and a couple of days. I have also attached a picture of myself with Tanis at 31 weeks, and my belly is so much bigger this time around. My husband payed me a very nice compliment the other day. As you can tell, my belly is HUGE, however I haven't gained much weight elsewhere, and he pointed that out. (so far, I have only gained about 25 pounds) It was one of those things that might have sounded different to someone on the outside, but it actually made me tear up. :) It was the sweetest thing he could have said at that time because I was feeling really down on my body image at that moment.

Me, with Tanis at 32 weeks

(please excuse the horrible stretch marks)

Me, with baby #3, at only 29 weeks

Today I go to pre-register at the hospital, and hopefully get daddy and sister a tour of the beautiful hospital. I have an ultrasound and Dr's appointment on Thursday. The ultrasound is to see if my cervix is changing and to check babies weight, and Dr's appointment is to check my blood pressure and weight. Seems we are going in the direction of pre-eclampsia again. This time though, I have a Dr that is monitoring us way better.

Dr's Appointment

2010-03-24T07:53:00.000-06:00

Well, I had a Dr's apt today. Had to go in for the Glucola testing...BLAH!!! However, this time I managed to not have to drink the drink twice as I did with Tan, and it wasn't as bad as last time. Now they have a fruit punch flavor. Sort of tastes like Hawaiian Fruit Punch with a TON of sugar. It did, however, make me super sick all the rest of the day. I also had more blood tests done, as is always fun.

Now for the kicker. My blood pressure last week was 122/66, and today it was up to 140/90, which we all know is no good. So, they had me lay down for about ten minutes on my left side, as is routine when your blood pressure is high, and it was then 130/90. The number we wanted to go down didn't. My Dr has now put me on a very low dose of blood pressure meds twice a day, and did I mention an inhaler. Apparently I can't breath right either and that can affect my blood pressure.

I have my first CO ultrasound next week to measure the babies weight, check and see if the contractions I have been having have made me dilate at all, and to make sure the baby is healthy. I can't wait just to get some assurance.

Humane Society

2010-03-21T11:58:00.000-06:00

Yesterday my aunt, uncle, cousin, hubby and Tan all went to an awesome German bakery here and then took the kids to the Humane Society. This place was awesome. It was all indoors, clean as could be, and they even had a horse stable outside with a huge walking area for the dogs to be taken out. Tan had a blast looking, saying Hi to all the kitties and doggies. It was hard to not walk out of there with a little one, but we kept telling ourself we have the baby and a toddler and it's ok for now. lol. Boy do I miss having a little doggy around.

Tan getting a kick out of her first rabbit view

In a baby voice saying "hi baby, hiiii" lol

Looking at the doggies

Again, the doggies

The end of the kitties

Our First Snow Day

2010-03-20T08:41:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was a beautiful snow day here in Colorado. We woke up to a back and front yard covered in snow. Tan had a blast. We didn't have the right grear so we were lucky enough to have a hat from my cousin. She love it.

Tan when she first went outsite

Tan standing next to the truck, kicking the snow

Daddy cleaning off the windshield

My aunt and uncles front yard early in the morning. The basement is as big as the whole house. Loving it.

Picture from the truck window

Mommy and Tan relaxing after playing in the snow

The Garden of the Gods (last Sat)

2010-03-17T11:21:00.000-06:00

This past Saturday my cousin called us and asked if we wanted to take a nice drive with her. Get out the house you say, ab-so-lutely! She took us to a place here called Garden of the Gods. It was such a nice day, and to say that Tanis had fun, would be an understatement. She was so so happy. She had to climb all the big rocks, and tap all the little rocks that were on the paths. It was one of the first nice days here, in the high 40's, and if any of you are up in elevation know that when it's sunny and 40 it feels to be about 70. It was gorgeous outside. Here are some pictures.

A view from the truck window

The first "little" rock Tan spotted and climbed

She saw a teenager on here and had to be lifted up, my cousin of course obliged!

A little whole she found but her head didn't fit in it..lol

Daddy climbed up this rock and my cousin lifted her up there with him, a daredevil she is!

These were taken when my cousin took us a little ways up the mountain and we went to 7Sisters, or 7Falls. It was so pretty. And there are signs posted everywhere not to contaminate the water because it's the cities water that goes to the water processing plant. The water comes out of the faucet here completely drinkable, and very very very cold! I love it. No ice needed at all.

If you see the bridge in the middle, it goes up really high, and back and forth, straight up seven times. Hence the name. Of course I wasn't aloud to go up, but it was so pretty.

This is the bottom of the above picture. We went and stood at the bottom of the fall and took this picture. Yes, I am huge! lol.

MAJOR update!!!

2010-03-12T14:10:00.000-07:00

Wow, what a crazy few weeks it has been. We've been packing and working on things like crazy for the last three weeks and dealing with much drama in our lives. The week before we were to leave we got rear-ended by a Suburban. I spent that whole night in the hospital being monitored as I was having contractions off and on and my abdomen was very tender. All was ok, however from then on I was instructed with more strict rules and regulations for the rest of the pregnancy. (I have been having contractions since I was 20 weeks but my Dr at the time didn't believe me. The monitors proved me right.)

My cousin flew out from CO to help us load up our trailer and truck and to drive the really long drive with us. We made it to Colorado in less than two days. I say we did pretty good, and because we had good company it didn't take that long. As for the little one driving that far, she was having a blast. She loved the scenery and my cousin just happened to bring a DVD player, which we didn't pull out until the end of the last night. Surprisingly our little girl fell sleep as soon as we hit the hotel the first night. She did fantastic!

End of our first day

On the second day when we hit the view of snow, WOW, she was exstatic. (and might I say so damn cute!)

We are finally here, have been for about a week. Things are going great. Loving being around such a huge part of our family. Tan emediately took to the whole family so that was a huge comfort. It's so beatiful. (will post pics when I can find my camera-although it's so old I doubt it would do justice to the views we have). From my aunts front yard, we have a magnificant view of Pikes Peak. Too bad I can't take a nice drive up there. I am currently at my max for elevation. Tanis got to see her first snow, except I was sad because I was at the Drs. When I got home she was jumping up and down, pointing outside and screaming "snows". lol

I am now officially 27 weeks today. All the morning sickness, the smell sensativity and normal third trimester pains are here. I have my first Dr's apt here in CO on Tues. It's with a new Drs office, which is also attached to a new hospital. Talk about an upgrade from where I was before. The hospital has one whole floor dedicated to L&D. You get on the floor, the NICU is down one hallway, they have private observation rooms (if you are staying overnight but not actually in labor), they have the L&D rooms, (which are massive compared to the ones in the hospital I had my last two babies), they have private post-partum rooms, the nursery is on the same floor, (they take the baby shortly after birth with daddy to do pictures, first shots and first bath, and unlike where I had Tan this one you can send the baby to when ever needed, which for myself is a blessing. I mean new parents do need some sleep, especially if it's a three day labor), and the c-section surgical rooms are on the same floor. If your baby has to stay at the hospital and you are to be discharged, they also have the option (room permitting) to stay on a "hotel babisis" or if you qualify they have rooms under the Ronald McDonald house program. My Dr's office is at the building next door, but they have a Dr's only walkway for during business hours. That way if you are in L&D they can walk over and walk back to patience. I love it. We shall see how it goes when I meet my Dr for the frist time. The nurse that gave me the walk through said that he was a really nice good Dr. We shall see.

Tan is getting more and more excited for the baby. It's now "her" baby ...lol. She hugs and kisses my tummy all the time. I'll be laying on the couch and she'll come over, lift up my shirt and down my pants and say "hi baby, i wub you baby" and rub my tummy. I think the little one in there knows her voice now because the baby will kick all of a sudden. :)

Well, not sure what else I am missing, but hope everyone else is doing good.

Hugs**

Baby Bump

2010-03-02T13:50:00.000-07:00

Hi there everyone. I know it's been a long time for an update, however there has been a lot going on lately. I will do a massive update in the next week or two. Sorry for the delay.

As for me and the wee one, all is going ok. Here is a picture at 24weeks. Yes, I am huge, and I feel huge. lol. I am already at the point of "when will this be over", but I think it has more for the fact that I can't wait for our little one to arrive. And I can't wait to share this baby with the world.

Hope everyone out there is doing ok.

Baby & Mommy Update, Take a Guess?

2010-01-28T11:12:00.000-07:00

Hey there ya'll. I know it's been a while, don't have internet at home so it's hard to post.
I am now 20 weeks along, and boy oh boy does it ever feel like it. This child had taken on a new meaning to me of being pregnant. I had my Drs apt last week, I am doing good, babys heartbeat is in the 140's-150's, and it's sitting super low. So low, that I am now no longer comfortable in bed, or sitting with my legs crossed, or even slightly touching. Can you say not-a-lady-much. :) This little one is already a little handful while in utero, so I am hoping that it will be an easy new born, although if you have met my husband and my daughter, um, yeah, we shall see.

We do know what the gender is, however this time, we are going to do many things differently. We are going to keep the gender as a surprise until the little bundle of joy gets here, however I am going to post a picture of myself at 12wks, 16wks and 20wks and I would love see what everyones opinion is of what it's going to be. Then, when it is welcomed in to this world, I will post a picture. Let's see who's right.

This delivery, I have decided to keep to ourselves. At the birth of Tanis, I had my grandmother, my husband, and my husbands mothers friend in the room for the whole 3 days I was in labor. We did have friends stop by for moral support which was nice. However, after the baby was born there were people in my family that made it more drama that it needed to be, especially at a time when it should have been all happiness for us and our new baby. Also, the Dr has made it clear that I will most likely have all the same complications as my last two pregnancy, the baby will most likely be early, and I will most likely have all the after problems. Due to this, and the family drama that followed the birth of my daughter, it will be myself and my husband in the delivery room. We are going to request that all visits be after we arrive home safe and healthy.

Here's our bundle of joy:

12 Weeks

16 Weeks (Christmas Day)

20 Weeks 3 days

And yes everyone, I am that big! lol. So, there are the pictures, please take your guess.......

First Trip to the Dentist

2010-01-28T10:51:00.000-07:00

Tanis had her very first appointment last Monday. She did fantastic. She had her first cleaning and her first "teeth inspection". The following day she went to the Dr where she had her 2 yr old physical, got another shot and a nasal flu shot. She did fantastic!

Getting her teeth cleaned

Her new Tooth Brush & paste

Cleaning

3:00 a.m.

2010-01-06T08:22:00.000-07:00

Ok, here's the deal. Every morning for about the last two and a half months I have been waking up at exactly 3 a.m. I have no idea why, nothing in my surroundings are causing so I'm throwing it out there for opinions. It's getting really annoying. Any ideas?

Christmas & Update

2010-01-05T12:05:00.000-07:00

First off, I hope that you all had a wonderful Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Our Christmas was very good. The kids got to open their PJ's Christmas Eve, as is both our families traditions.

Christmas morning was awesome. Michael knew what to expect but this was Tanis' first "real" Christmas. She woke up, saw the presents under the tree and was in awe. Of course, as traditions go, they ate breakfast first while admiring all those lovely presents. (yes, the anticipation was torture)! I picked up a tip from an un-named TV mom, and I used laundry baskets for the kids to put their presents in. For one, organization, and for two so that Tanis would not get into any of her brothers smaller toys. It made clean up easier, and the kids got to live out of the hampers for several days before having to put the toys away. Attached are pictures of Christmas Eve, Day, and night with my father stopping by. Sadly, I am in none of the pictures as this lovely baby of mine was causing horrendous back pain and I was almost unable to get off the couch. (Be warned many pictures to follow)

Michaels Christmas Eve PJ shirt and sweatpans :) Yes, he loved the shirt!

Tan and big brother Christmas Eve!

Christmas Morning

The on present that wasn't wrapped, to Tan from brother Michael

Michael opening his new mini digital camera

Tan un-doing her first tight ribbon

Begging for another present

The game he wanted

Santa (daddy) and Tanis

Spongebob (yes, she's addicted)

Tanis egging brother on to open his present

Tan and her stocking

Michael, Papa Kidd and Tanis Christmas Night

(papa brought over the presents because due to my back we were unable to visit them)

Tanis got a hooded towel and a tent and Michael got an awesome Steelers blanket and jersey.

Tan opening her present (yes it's Spongebob bubble bath) from

her santa in the SC :)

As for the pregnancy, this Friday I will be 18 weeks along. I will attached a picture I took Christmas Day, which was me at 16 weeks. This pregnancy seems to be going by so much faster than my other two, but it has been so much harder on me. I am in a lot of pain, still can't eat much although my appetite is coming back slowly but surely, and things are staying healthy. Right now that's what matters. I am starting to really feel this one move. About a month ago I felt the normal "flutters" but now, when I am in certain positions, I really feel the baby move. Full force, and I am so loving it! I know when I am almost due I won't be saying the same thing, but right now, I am going to cherish the moment in knowing that because the little one is moving around, all is well. We still do now know the sex of the baby. I have a Dr's apt this Friday and hoping to have an ultrasound in the next couple of weeks. When the time is right I will let you all know what the beautiful babe will be.

On a sad note, my grandfather has lost his battle with cancer. He passed away on December 29. He made is clear several weeks ago when he knew his time was coming to end that he was going to make it through my grandparents 55th wedding anniversary, my grandma's birthday (which both are right before Christmas) Christmas and my uncles birthday. (Dec 27th) He made it through his goal and now he is in a better place and no longer in pain. He was a great man, a great father, grandfather and uncle. He will be missed so much. My thoughts and prayers are with all my family.

Not Much Going on Here

2009-12-09T11:50:00.000-07:00

Well, not alot to update, but going to make it a quick.

Thanksgiving was nice. Wednesday we drove Michael to OC, that was an adventure in itself. It took us almost 9 1/2 hours to get from Bakersfield, to OC and back. It was c-r-a-z-y. Thanksgiving day the hubby, daughter and I hung out and spent some time together. We had a really nice dinner, and even better nap. We simply spent the weekend relaxing and enjoying each others company. As of Sunday, Tan and I both ended up with a cold, that has yet to leave us.

As for the pregnancy, all is going well right now. Had an apt last Fri, had some blood drawn and go back again this Friday for the test results. I have only gained 1lb this past month. The Dr is happy with that, says it should be a little more, however since I am still a little neausou it's ok. I got to hear a really good heartbeat. It was 150-165 beats per minute. Tan screamed "my baby" when the Dr went to touch my tummy. She's already so protective! So, things seem to be good. I am already having sciatic pain on the right side (my sons pregnancy damaged the nerve) and round ligament pain on the left. Which means any time now the little one will be migrating up. Yay! lol. We will not be able to do the ultrasound until about the second week of the pregnancy. The Dr wants to make sure that I am far enough along to have to perinatologist be able to check all the babies growth and all the vital organs. He wants to make sure all my medical problems have not caused any problems with the developement of the baby. I am praying that all is well with the little one. (yes, we are also anxiously awaiting that time to find out what the little pea will be)

Tanis is on her way to being potty trained. We started the week of Thanksgiving and she's doing great. This week we have only had one accident so far. We are in big girl underwear all day long. We only sleep in diapers. To say that I am so proud of her is an understatement. She's so happy she's doing good too. She goes, gets up, claps her hands and screams "yay, I did it". She makes me smile all day long and I am so loving being able to watch her grow. I will also be happy to have my toddler out of diapers when I have another one on the way that will be wearing them. Talk about saving money.

I have had some more bad news about my grandfather who has fallen ill. He was in remission of cancer when it came back with full force. He has lost a major amount of weight, and as of about ten minutes ago my dad called to tell me that he is now in the care of hospice and on home oxygen. The last picture that I saw of my grandfather (from Thanksgiving day) reminded me of the way my grandmother looked not a week before she passed away. I pray for his sake that his passing is with peace, and that with the support of my family, her church, her church preschool that when the time comes my grandmother will be ok. I also pray for my father. My dad loves his father so, and I know that just for him to be able to call me and tell me what is going on is very hard for him.

Other than that, not much else is going. Missing everyone for sure. Hope everyone out there is doing great.

The baby list

2009-11-20T08:57:00.000-07:00

Yes, I'm only 11 weeks, but I am trying to stay organized and on top of everything. With the way my emotions have been playing out lately, I can't count on a clear brain.We are trying to plan ahead and to get a little at a time. (not much room for storage right now) I know it's only been two years since I had my last kid, but I don't want to forget anything. Out of the necessities, what do I need to get baby to be? Here is my list. Please let me know if I am missing anything.

Car Seat & Stroller Set
Crib
   Bedding Set
   Water Proof pads
   Wedge
Swing (not necessity but need to use to keep away from curious 2 yr old when my hands are busy) :)
Monitor
Diaper Pail (no one around this time to take out poop diapers)
Diapers
Wipes
Burp Clothes (re-usable diapers)
Mylicon drops
Pacifier (if this one takes it, last child didn't)
Bottles (for later)
Drops ins (for later)
Bibs
Bath Tub
Baby Wash
Baby lotion
Wash Clothes
Baby Towels
Clothes
Receiving blankets

We already have plenty of baby blankets, the pack-n-play, baby ointment, etc.

2 days shy of 11 weeks

2009-11-18T11:03:00.000-07:00

Ok, just a quick update, for those of you that are interested. This is how big the baby and I now look. I feel huge, I think I look huge, but I'm just pregnant, or so I am told. :) These were taken as of this morning. My last pregnancy I took pictures every week, of my true belly, however this time around, I will only be publishing "clothing" shots.

This am..wow I'm big

Yes, those are maternity pants. Mine didn't fit as of almost 4 weeks ago.

Update

2009-11-13T09:17:00.000-07:00

Well, there has been quite a bit going on in the last two weeks. So, forgive me if I ramble, however I am sickly right now, sleep deprived and not completely in my right mind.

Pregnancy:

Had my 9 week checkup last week, (I am now 10 weeks today) and all went very well. Dr said that the ultrasound showed nothing bad, that the baby was doing good, the heart beat was very good. I have only gained 6lbs, which is very good, however I am very much showing. I asked the Dr about this and he said that because I have had two kids before, it's as if my body already knows what do to, the muscles are loosening up and my body is already making room for baby. Wow, scary huh. Well, my next appointment will not be for another month. At that time he will run blood test to check on my electrolytes and thyroid levels. (that is unless I end up in the ER before then) The morning sickness has not gone away. It's subsiding, A LITTLE, but the Dr said by about week 14-16 it should go away. So, I only have about 4-6 weeks left. Joy. In addition to the morning sickness, I now have a cold. No, it's not the piggy flu because my Dr made me get the vaccine, but it still sucks all the same. Because I am so high risk I am not aloud to take anything. My nose is so plugged up and I have that dry cough from the itchiness in the throat but luckily I have had no fever. YAY!

This picture was taken last week, T was going down to kiss my belly

Michael

This past Tuesday was my sons 9th Birthday. I still can't believe that I have a 9 year old child. Wow, that makes me feel old. I can still remember the day I brought him into this world like it was yesterday. We didn't do anything but as it was a weekday, however he had fun all the same. Below I will post some pictures of him opening his presents. He got some cool things, however I think the best was the video game he got because he and dad played for half the night. The funny thing about these pictures is the wrapping paper. Mom and dad got the presents and the card, but got home and forgot the wrapping paper, so he got sisters left over paper. He got a kick out of it so it was all good. After his present we of course had cake, then later on in the evening papa showed up, which is always a nice thing. All in all, he said he had a great Birthday.

His almost life side Transformers card

His new DC Shoes (he's a DC freak)

His video game, happy, I think so...& sister was jumping for joy & she didn't even know why :)

Tanis

I can not believe how big she is getting and how frigging smart she is. She shocks and amazes us every day. My dad came by last week to bring me a pair of maternity pants my step mom sewed, and of course, as always Tan was all over him. She ran to her room, got her tool box, and made papa play for a little while.

My dad playing tools with Tan

Tan has started to bring her toys out to the living room when I am doing other things. They are all in tubs. Then when it's time, I tell her to clean them up. She puts all her toys in the correct tubs then transports them in to her room. The funny thing is, that no one told her or showed her, she learned that it's less trips if she stacks them up and pushes them in there. It's weird because when I look at her sometimes, I want her to go back to being the little baby I held in my arms the day I brought her home from the hospital, but then I look again, she's a very tall 2 year old little girl who's just too smart for her britches. She really gives her brother a run for his money, that's for sure.

She's cleaned up & stacked them all up

She's pushing them all to her room

Other than that, we have all been dealing with this darn cold that's going around. Right now, it's Tan and I that are sick. Hoping it goes by very quickly.

As always, thank you all for your support and well wishes. Hugs to you all!!

Mememe

2009-10-06T13:25:00.000-06:00

Ok, here it goes, my first memem post courtesy of @PrincessJenn over at Princess Pros for passing it on. Hope i do it right.

As she put it, there are 3 Rules:
* Answer the questions below using only one word
* Thank the blogger who gave it to you
* Pass it on to 6 of your favorite bloggers

Now the questions:

Where is your cell phone? bed
Your hair? waivy
Your mother? missed
Your father? manly
Your favorite food? pizza
Your dream last night? scary
Your favorite drink? water
Your dream/goal? happiness
What room are you in? bedroom
Your hobby? hmmmm
Your fear? drowning
Where do you want to be in 6 years? happy
Where were you last night? home
Something you aren’t? denial
Muffins? yummy
Wish list item? Car
Where did you grow up? California
Last thing you did? tweeted
What are you wearing? clothes
Your TV? big
Your pets? none
Your friends? yup
Your life? chaotic
Your mood? happy
Missing someone? Always
Vehicle? truck
Something you’re not wearing? socks
Your favorite store? oldnavy
Your favorite color? pink
When was the last time you laughed? morning
Last time you cried? yesterday
Your best friend? Cristin
One place that I go over and over? bed
One person who emails me regularly? none
Favorite place to eat? unkown

Now for the fun part – this is where I torture my friends and force them to play along:

CCInBetween

adventures with addison